Verne Troyer Mini-Me Sex Tape

Today, Blue Blood’s design czar Forrest Black and I rolled over to band manager Jason Fiber’s lovely Hollywood Hills home to do some press on the always-charming and fun Andy LaPlegua. Andy is touring in supporting of the forthcoming Frost EP from Combichrist. So, uhm, naturally, we drank beer and Jason brought up that there was a new sex tape potentially coming out starring Verne Troyer.

I confessed that I already knew this as I’d started my day reading the adult industry trades mags, who were all abuzz with the info that SugarDVD had started the bidding on the Mini-Me sex tape. SugarDVD CEO Jax stated publicly that he would only be into distributing the celebrity sex tape, if it were possible to get proper performer releases from both the actor Verne Troyer and his naked co-star.

I gave my opinion that a Verne Troyer sex tape would be very marketable, but the one I really want to see is where the drug dealer club kid (or whatever he was) allegedly tied up Joe Francis of Girls Gone Wild fame and made him confess his love of receiving anal on video, and then left him in the trunk of a car. Upon reflection, I don’t really want to see a naked Joe Francis being abused, but the karmic justice of it appeals to me.

In the unlikely event that you do not know who Verne Troyer is, he is best known for his role as Mini-Me, the bad guy’s smaller doppelganger protege from Mike Myers’ Austin Powers. He has also appeared in everything from Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas to Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone to rap videos and Apple commercials. Really Apple commercials tend to be sorta like viral sex vids for marketing anyway.

What would make a Verne Troyer celebrity sex tape so marketable is that he is famous, good-looking, and thirty-two inches tall. Which is a pretty rare combo. Fun facts to know and share: Verne Troyer was prom king in high school and is also an accomplished stunt man, the latter partly because nobody else would be the right build to body double for his stunts.

Warner Bros. subsidiary TMZ released a teaser from the video, pictured above, and it does indeed appear to actually feature Verne Troyer. The mere fact that Warner Bros. owns the gossip and scandal site TMZ really says something about the nature of fame and celebrity today. Apart from anything else, it points out that Warner is more on top of their approach to the online world than most media megacorps. Manager Jason Fiber was president of Cordless Recordings, the digital record label or “e-label” subsidiary of Warner Music Group. Today, Jason, whose background clearly shows he knows something about internet marketing, was joking that he was going to have to add consulting on celeb sex tape strategies to the list of what he did for clients.

I report that Jason was joking, but Verne Troyer’s STARmeter on IMDB is up 90% since last week. So, uhm, yeah, joking. Whether or not anyone ever sees Verne Troyer naked on video, he will definitely appear in this summer’s blockbuster from Mike Myers called The Love Guru.

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Posted by Amelia G on June 26, 2008. Filed under Blue Blood. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0. You can leave a response or trackback to this entry