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My sister just got out of rehab a few days ago...she seems to be changed for the better. I can't really trust her, but I'm trying to give her a shot, and let her know I'm happy with the improvements shes made. I feel like she's just wearing a facade until we all turn our heads for a second....and shes back to her old lying, deceitful, drugged out ways. :confused:
Is it wrong of me to not fully trust her?
well most people do drugs because they like them. they stop doing them because they don't want to do them anymore. generally forcing someone to do something that they don't want to do is only going to make them cooperate with you when they have to, and then do what they want to when they can get away with it.
you don't have to do anything. she's your sister so you should love her, but you don't have to trust her if she's not trustworthy.
I'm in agreeance. You don't have to trust her but you can still support her. Just don't make accusations and be careful at the same time. Goodluck though.
As for doing it cause they like it. I'm on two sides. I've got many friends addicted to the drug lifestyle, whether it's meth, weed, E, sometimes coke. Some want to break free but find themselves falling back into habit and truly struggle with their own self-hatred. Best thing for them is to be removed and go through some therapy. True though that others just LOVE the way they live life, though from the outside it seems fairly self destructive.
Morning Glory pretty much nailed it.
I know I don't trust my sister.
You could trust her on the condition that if she lies or steals from you that you will beat up her boyfriends one by one till they don't want to hang out with her anymore and thus solving half of the problem of her poor choices in friends.
I think, give her the opportunity to prove herself, but dont rely on it.
my sister did the same thing, she has been in and out of rehab and abandoned her kids. Shes also metally ill though. I gave her the benifit of the doubt, but when she hurt my son, thats when I stopped trusting her, i've written her out of my life.
good luck
first of all, what type of rehab program was it? in or out-patient? i ask because of of the first trials that a newly rehabbed person will have to work through comes when they regain their freedom and are thusly exposed to increased temptation to use or seek out the substance of choice again. depending on how much exposure to the drug lifestyle she has her temptation may be to resisted. plus there is the whole reasons that she was using in the first place. if it was stress related or a means of self medication, well, hopefully they were able to address that in the program.
as to the whole trust issue, i would not trust her at first. make her earn back your trust and take it slowly. she is still learning to trust herself again.
Maybe she should get pregnant. A baby might help straighten her out. :D
you aren't obligated to trust anyone you don't feel comfortable trusting, it's something you have to earn......something she should have learned from rehab so if you don't she should know to accept it as something only she can change
Well heres the situation, I have given her my trust, love and support. (btw it was in patient) She hasn't broken it yet...and I hope she doesn't because she has made tremendous changes to her lifestyle...she's quit hanging around the people who encouraged her behavior...she's actually listening to my dad and following the house rules...I'm really impressed with her improvements...
thats awesome man :D i really hope she can make it that way for good.
As do I :):)
yay for love and support!
So...uhm she has my trust no longer.
She's been gone for 2 days now, no clue where she is.
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Originally Posted by TheQuietPlace
sorry hunny, I hate it when they do that...my sister has been gone for 1year and 12 days...
Oh well,... are you suprised?
Nope.
But she did come home last night at like 1a...
can i ask how old is she? if i did that (after being in trouble in the past i mean) id get kicked out.
She's 15.
owch thats young....and kinda scary..im sorry.
Don't be sorry, she's fucking up her own life.
yeah, its just hard for some people to see what they are doing to their lives. i was hoping that rehab would be enough of a "reality check" to get her head straight. tough to deal with and not a fun spt to be in for you.:(
15... that makes a lot of sense, I doubt she feels the need to earn her own trust
*huge hugs*
Its extremely hard to see someone screwing their life up with drugs. Al-Anon may help for you and your family.
So I just found out through some sources that my sister has already relapsed.
She's also been leaving without permission, and stealing my shit. Last night it was my cigarettes, and tonight its my fucking cell phone. I can't leave ANYTHING of value in open sight otherwise it gets stolen.
I tried to trust her, but its been broken and I don't think it will ever be earned again.
I really want her in a group home outside of the state. I don't want her ass here. All she does is spit lies. And I'm fucking done with people like that.
I really want the best for her, but she doesn't know whats good for her as she is still hanging around the people that encouraged her use, and to elude her family for MONTHS at a time.
i do want to tell you that, when I was 13-14 i was on crank and had been arrested several times...i grew out of it after a really bad experience,now im okay..so things could look up...in years
I'm sure she could have a near OD, and she would still do it, she's stubborn like that.