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Thread: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

  1. #1
    and your little dog too
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    Default is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    from yahoo

    Grandma: Octuplets mom obsessed with having kids

    By RAQUEL MARIA DILLON, Associated Press Writer Raquel Maria Dillon, Associated Press Writer Sat Jan 31, 4:32 pm ET

    LOS ANGELES The woman who gave birth to octuplets this week conceived all 14 of her children through in vitro fertilization, is not married and has been obsessed with having children since she was a teenager, her mother said.

    Angela Suleman told The Associated Press she was not supportive when her daughter, Nadya Suleman, decided to have more embryos implanted last year.

    "It can't go on any longer," she said in a phone interview Friday. "She's got six children and no husband. I was brought up the traditional way. I firmly believe in marriage. But she didn't want to get married."

    Nadya Suleman, 33, gave birth Monday in nearby Bellflower. She was expected to remain in the hospital for at least a few more days, and her newborns for at least a month.

    A spokeswoman at Kaiser Permanente Bellflower Medical Center said the babies were were progressing daily, with all eight breathing unassisted and being tube-fed.

    While her daughter recovers, Angela Suleman is taking care of the other six children, ages 2 through 7, at the family home in Whittier, about 15 miles east of downtown Los Angeles.

    She said she warned her daughter that when she gets home from the hospital, "I'm going to be gone."

    Angela Suleman said her daughter always had trouble conceiving and underwent in vitro fertilization treatments because her fallopian tubes are "plugged up."

    There were frozen embryos left over after her previous pregnancies and her daughter didn't want them destroyed, so she decided to have more children.

    Her mother and doctors have said the woman was told she had the option to abort some of the embryos and, later, the fetuses. She refused.

    Her mother said she does not believe her daughter will have any more children.

    "She doesn't have any more (frozen embryos), so it's over now," she said. "It has to be."

    Nadya Suleman wanted to have children since she was a teenager, "but luckily she couldn't," her mother said.

    "Instead of becoming a kindergarten teacher or something, she started having them, but not the normal way," he mother said.

    Her daughter's obsession with children caused Angela Suleman considerable stress, so she sought help from a psychologist, who told her to order her daughter out of the house.

    "Maybe she wouldn't have had so many kids then, but she is a grown woman," Angela Suleman said. "I feel responsible and I didn't want to throw her out."

    Little psychological research has been conducted on the reasons some mothers seem hooked on repeated pregnancies. David Diamond, a co-director for the Center for Reproductive Psychology in San Diego, said mothers can be drawn to repeat pregnancies for a number of reasons, with some finding the experience so satisfying they choose to become surrogates.

    Diane G. Sanford, a psychologist and author specializing in women's reproductive mental health, said while she doesn't know much about Nadya Suleman's background, women that have obsessive-compulsive disorder can become fixated on different obsessions.

    "Her obsession centers around children, having children and being a mother," she said. "To what degree are her esteem and identity based on being a mom and why has this from a young age been such a preoccupation of hers?"

    Yolanda Garcia, 49, of Whittier, said she helped care for Nadya Suleman's autistic son three years ago.

    "From what I could tell back then, she was pretty happy with herself, saying she liked having kids and she wanted 12 kids in all," Garcia told the Long Beach Press-Telegram.

    "She told me that all of her kids were through in vitro, and I said 'Gosh, how can you afford that and go to school at the same time?"' she added. "And she said it's because she got paid for it."

    Garcia said she did not ask for details.

    Nadya Suleman holds a 2006 degree in child and adolescent development from California State University, Fullerton, and as late as last spring she was studying for a master's degree in counseling, college spokeswoman Paula Selleck told the Press-Telegram.

    Her fertility doctor has not been identified. Her mother told the Los Angeles Times all the children came from the same sperm donor but she declined to identify him.

    Birth certificates reviewed by The Associated Press identify a David Solomon as the father for the four oldest children. Certificates for the other children were not immediately available.

    Angela Suleman told reporters Friday that doctors implanted far fewer than eight embryos but they multiplied. Experts said this could be possible since Nadya Suleman's system has likely been hyperstimulated for years with fertilization treatments and drugs.

    The news that the octuplets' mother already had six children sparked an ethical debate. Some medical experts were disturbed to hear that she was offered fertility treatment, and troubled by the possibility that she was implanted with so many embryos.

    "You should always shoot for one," said Dr. Marcelle Cedars, a professor and director of reproductive health at the University of California, San Francisco, Medical Center, who worried about the increased risk of potential health complications for the babies.

    Others worried that she would be overwhelmed trying to raise so many children and would end up relying on public support.

    "This woman could not comprehend the ramifications of having eight children of the same age at the same time," said Judith Horowitz, a Parkland, Fla.-based psychologist and author who works with couples on fertility issues. "After Pampers stops delivering the free diapers, then what?"

    The eight babies six boys and two girls were delivered by cesarean section weighing between 1 pound, 8 ounces and 3 pounds, 4 ounces. Forty-six physicians and staff assisted in the deliveries.

    ___

    Associated Press writers Thomas Watkins and Noaki Schwartz contributed to this report.

  2. #2
    athenahollow's Avatar Smut Peddler
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    If the woman can afford to undergo invetro so much, I think she will be fine with hiring some help if she needs it, and can afford to pay for the kids.

    I don't think it's necessary to have a father AND mother. I know plenty of kids who grew up with single parents who turned out just fine.

    And hell, I'm not married, and I have a 2 1/2 year old. Yes, the father lives with us, and yes him and I are together, but by her mother's standards, there's something wrong w/ us because we aren't married.

  3. #3
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    I read about this case.

    Although I don't feel that a father is necessary to raise children, there does seem to be something pathological about this woman.

    Especially in these times when we need LESS people on the planet instead of more.

  4. #4
    Ajax Knucklebones's Avatar God fearing atheist
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    The lady's nuts.

  5. #5
    VoltaireBlue's Avatar just is
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    who is paying for these kids if she is unemployed?

  6. #6
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    yeah, it's not normal to want that many children.................unless you need the free labour or somehting

  7. #7

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    That's the case with most immigrants in our ghetto... pumping out babies for social benefit.

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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    I think its a pretty selfish act to have so many children. This lady is only thinking about what she wants, she said she wanted 12 kids, so shes gonna have those kids and 2 more, regardless of how she got them. Shes unemployed, so she'll just get welfare, and with 14 kids, it will be a lot, which means tax payers will be paying for her to stay home. She'll probably get daycare assistance, which means more government checks. If she was crafty she should go on talk shows, and they'd probably give her some really good handouts as well. Unfortunetly, those poor kids will probably fight for the attention of their mother. I hope she gets a couple of really good live-in nannys for the sake of the kids.

  9. #9
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    the US still has welfare?

  10. #10
    Ajax Knucklebones's Avatar God fearing atheist
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Karl
    the US still has welfare?
    ah yeah...It's called a bailout...Duh!

  11. #11
    Ajax Knucklebones's Avatar God fearing atheist
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by SyntheticShock
    I think its a pretty selfish act to have so many children. This lady is only thinking about what she wants, she said she wanted 12 kids, so shes gonna have those kids and 2 more, regardless of how she got them. Shes unemployed, so she'll just get welfare, and with 14 kids, it will be a lot, which means tax payers will be paying for her to stay home. She'll probably get daycare assistance, which means more government checks. If she was crafty she should go on talk shows, and they'd probably give her some really good handouts as well. Unfortunetly, those poor kids will probably fight for the attention of their mother. I hope she gets a couple of really good live-in nannys for the sake of the kids.
    Her mom and dad are her live-in nannys, but now with this bullshit, I think they're getting out of dodge. They've had enough of her craziness.

    And she's already trying to work out deals on talk shows and crap. I think she should be like Apu and put them in a circus.

  12. #12
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by Ajax Knucklebones
    ah yeah...It's called a bailout...Duh!

    ooohhh............I get it now!!

  13. #13

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by SyntheticShock
    . If she was crafty she should go on talk shows, and they'd probably give her some really good handouts as well. .


    brings to mind the shows on TLC..Jon & Kate plus 8 or 17 kids and counting:...


    someone shoot mem now..PLEASE!

  14. #14
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    I love how her parents are pulling the, "Traditional Values" Card about having a husband, but backtracking to liberal land when talking about her 'choice' to abort the fetuses.

    In the abstract, there is nothing wrong with a woman raising a baby without a husband. I wish everyone could have excellent extended family that would assist any parent with parenting duties. I think its a reeking shame that there's more isolation in terms of parenting than there should be. (also, France gets awesome points for their Government nanny program for single working mothers).

    I don't know this lady's story... But it seems like a sad case of parents/people leaving a situation because they don't approve of the mother, without considering that their presence could have a great impact on their grand-children. That kind of opposition to the reality of a situation, and the 'she did it to herself' routine is a bit immature.

  15. #15

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Who's pumping her?

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    nathanmbailey's Avatar Batteries not included
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    6 boys from that little endevor, and how many of the first set of 6 or whatever are boys? It's one thing for a woman to raise a couple of sons by herself, but with that many, they need a father figure, and something tells me she's not that appealing to look at. I want to know, if she's smart enough to be starting on her master's, how does she not realize that those kids need some kind of man in their lives.

    Bitch needs to give up some of those kids to couples that can't have children and can't afford trying invetro. And I say good for her mother, getting out of that situation her daughter is putting her into. It's one thing for the grandmother to help take care of a kid while the mother works or tries to finish school, but that shit is re-fucking-diculous.

  17. #17
    mystoo's Avatar Pirate Hooker
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    It's messed up for anyone to have 14 kids at all. End of story.

  18. #18
    keiko's Avatar baker of geekery
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    i was ranting about this on the way home today. the us govmnt practically pays for people to stay home and have kids but those of us who don't have children are basically shut out of the govmnt assistance programs. there are women all over the states who stay home with their 3+ kids from various fathers and get sent checks from $450 per kid a month just because they have kids they otherwise wouldn't be able to feed. the rest of us are forced to struggle in this shitty economy and when we end up down on our luck no hand out from uncle sam will appear in our mail boxes, because we aren't baby farms.

    hell i'm one of maybe a dozen girls in my graduating class in high school that wasn't knocked up before my 5 year reunion.

    there has to be more to life and happiness than just unleashing more spawn on the face of the earth. i have to believe that.

    ~K

  19. #19
    mystoo's Avatar Pirate Hooker
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Don't forget about low income housing. I don't know if you have that in the U.S. but basically,these people with kids and no money get to live in say, a 3 bedroom townhouse with their rent being a whopping $350.
    Granted some people have 'situations' and may actually need some kind of help but there are far too many people milking the shitstem for way to long.

  20. #20

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    That is extremely irresponsible and selfish. If an unmarried person wants to have children I don't think there is anything wrong with it as long as they are capable of actually taking care of them. There are so many children without homes already, why not do adopt?

    Her fertility doctor should get their medical license revoked.

  21. #21

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by mystoo
    Don't forget about low income housing. I don't know if you have that in the U.S. but basically,these people with kids and no money get to live in say, a 3 bedroom townhouse with their rent being a whopping $350.
    Granted some people have 'situations' and may actually need some kind of help but there are far too many people milking the shitstem for way to long.

    IDK about every state in the US but in Missouri, there are some i know get the rent paid in full thru the DFS. Totally sucks being able to just pay rent, and these fucks(those who milk the system) get theirs paid with my hard earned taxes.

  22. #22
    Thistle Harlequin's Avatar Oldschool Member
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    She want's to be like Apu's wife from the Simpsons..haha the simpsons is such a psychic cartoon!

  23. #23

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by Vitorro
    IDK about every state in the US but in Missouri, there are some i know get the rent paid in full thru the DFS. Totally sucks being able to just pay rent, and these fucks(those who milk the system) get theirs paid with my hard earned taxes.
    How many people out there do you think are really having kids just for the free rent? Multiple people in this thread have mentioned people abusing the system but really how many women out there are thinking "Hmm...I should put myself though sever pain to get more money from the government even though having another kid is going to end up costing much more than I could ever get from the government." This woman with 14 kids is clearly a nutcase and I highly doubt most women on gov aid had kids just to get money from it. The reality is if you're on government aid you're still living in poverty. Yeah there are some people out there who would rather live in poverty than ever get a job but I think people are seriously overestimating the amount of people who are actually trying to abuse the system.

  24. #24
    Bikerpunk's Avatar Ill-intentioned bad apple
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    There's large parts of the Maritime provinces of Canada where having three kids is the only viable career option.

  25. #25
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    i heard about the octuplets ... then i found out about the other kids... and all the other crap... i want to smack this woman so hard....
    it's just wrong. ignoring the overpopulation problem... these poor kids! wtf. they're not going to ever be happy. a friend pointed out that if she gets up in the morning, she can spend like 1/2 an hour with each kid, then go to bed. what kind of way is that to raise kids? "oh yeah, i had 59 siblings growing up, i don't even know my mom's eye color..."

  26. #26
    mystoo's Avatar Pirate Hooker
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by Bikerpunk
    There's large parts of the Maritime provinces of Canada where having three kids is the only viable career option.
    Ya because when they turn 16 they move to Ontario to get work and send money home.

    Anyway, I want to know why she even needed fertility drugs if she already had 6 kids.

  27. #27
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by OliX
    Who's pumping her?

    I think it was a turkey baster

  28. #28
    lord_velos's Avatar Junior Member
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Hey lady!

    Its a vagina....not a clown car.

  29. #29
    Iggyisdead's Avatar boo-urns
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by VoltaireBlue
    who is paying for these kids if she is unemployed?
    The American tax payer probably...

  30. #30

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by lord_velos
    Hey lady!

    Its a vagina....not a clown car.

    If you're going to post that comment, you should add the pic:


    Hey, I count 14 kids...maybe that's where she got the idea!



  31. #31

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    It sucks when you're older than your uncle.
    You meant blaster, right MrK? It might be, it just might be.

  32. #32
    soma_stardust's Avatar ~soul-eating model~
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    so now i know it was all a publicity stunt. her mom kicked her out, and she only did it for book/movie or what the hell ever.
    SERIOUSLY WTF IS WRONG.
    baby farming is NOT COOL.
    i seriously hope these kids get taken away, put in nice homes, and she gets NOTHING. fucking whore-rag.

  33. #33
    mystoo's Avatar Pirate Hooker
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Well, I don't think she actually wanted to have 8 of the little fuckers, it just kinda happened that way.
    Also I saw some of that shit on the news, they were talking to her father and he said he had enough money to take care of them all so...ya.

  34. #34
    soma_stardust's Avatar ~soul-eating model~
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    well when you're pumped full of fertility drugs, multiple kids do tend to happen. and she sold her eggs, so she had an assload of money.
    for selling her eggs.
    so she could go on fertility drugs.
    and get artificially inseminated.
    to shoot out 8 extra children...
    and... be famous?
    i'd rather be famous for talent than the fact that i could be an asshole to innocent children.

  35. #35

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by soma_stardust
    so now i know it was all a publicity stunt. her mom kicked her out, and she only did it for book/movie or what the hell ever.
    SERIOUSLY WTF IS WRONG.
    baby farming is NOT COOL.
    i seriously hope these kids get taken away, put in nice homes, and she gets NOTHING. fucking whore-rag.
    So there's a rumor going on underground?

  36. #36
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    They implanted 8 eggs knowingly. Both her and her doctor knew they were cooking it up like an uber-denny's grand-slam fiasco. You have to wonder where that inner feeling of "Wait a fucking second, I seem to possibly be doing something incredibly stupid".... both of them...

    The fact she just tried to immediately remora onto Oprah just made it all the skankier.

    I just hope The Residents are watching - I believe... no... I expect this to be the basis of their next release.

  37. #37
    nathanmbailey's Avatar Batteries not included
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    She was on fertility drugs for the first 6 too I think. Isn't that nice?

    They have low income housing most places, but it's usually pretty crappy places, as appose to some of the really shitty places I've lived and payed more in rent than people in low income housing. At some point someone with some legal guns should step in and take those kids away from her and never let her see them again. Then shoot her, or just rip out her uterus so this shit won't happen again.

  38. #38

    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by LeilaHazlett
    How many people out there do you think are really having kids just for the free rent? Multiple people in this thread have mentioned people abusing the system but really how many women out there are thinking "Hmm...I should put myself though sever pain to get more money from the government even though having another kid is going to end up costing much more than I could ever get from the government." This woman with 14 kids is clearly a nutcase and I highly doubt most women on gov aid had kids just to get money from it. The reality is if you're on government aid you're still living in poverty. Yeah there are some people out there who would rather live in poverty than ever get a job but I think people are seriously overestimating the amount of people who are actually trying to abuse the system.
    True, for sure on not everyone trying to mik the system. Tho I should say, each state has its own guidelines on the welfare system. And then, each county in that state inturpets the regulations differently, or so it seems in my county. For example, if you look on Missouri the state website on DFS and assistance, then go to the actual county office, I find that what is stated online is about twice what the county office says is the limit on wages for recieving any kind of assistance. And then it is not just women who try to milk the system/ A lot of men are just as bad if not worse. But, when You are desperate, and the only way to get help is to cheat a bit, sometimes you gotta make that decision, for better or worse.

    But to My main point on the original post, I was actually referring to those who do so, just from being lazy, or otherwise conning the system on purpose.

  39. #39
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Actually.... while living up 'north', there was this couple who adopted like 6 kids so they could up their government supplemental income as they were paid per kid something like $300 or $600 dollars a month... I'm sure they loved them... I would too at $1800-$3600 a month free money.

    Meanwhile she's screwing everyone in town and he sells pot out of ACE hardware.... I mean.. Dude, WTF? - I haven't a clue who was watching the kids most of the time.... but there you go... it does happen.

  40. #40
    soma_stardust's Avatar ~soul-eating model~
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    Default Re: is it messed up for someone to have 14 kids w/no job and no/dad?

    Quote Originally Posted by DJ Bat
    Actually.... while living up 'north', there was this couple who adopted like 6 kids so they could up their government supplemental income as they were paid per kid something like $300 or $600 dollars a month... I'm sure they loved them... I would too at $1800-$3600 a month free money.

    Meanwhile she's screwing everyone in town and he sells pot out of ACE hardware.... I mean.. Dude, WTF? - I haven't a clue who was watching the kids most of the time.... but there you go... it does happen.
    word. people do it. all the time.
    shit, if i had a kid, i'd be getting more money than i am now.
    good thing i know better.

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