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Thread: new cult

  1. #1
    grebo's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default new cult

    Because all religions are just cults i have started a new one

    http://cultoflegion.blogspot.com

    Gospels Of Legion

    In the beginning...
    God created the heavens and the earth.
    Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.
    And God said, "Let there be light......... blah blah blah, blah blah blah
    A few eons later:
    Jesus got out of the boat, a man with an evil spirit came from the tombs to meet him. This man lived in the tombs, and no one could bind him any more, not even with a chain. For he had often been chained hand and foot, but he tore the chains apart and broke the irons on his feet. No one was strong enough to subdue him. Night and day among the tombs and in the hills he would cry out and cut himself with stones.
    When he saw Jesus from a distance, he ran and fell on his knees in front of him. He shouted at the top of his voice, "What do you want with me, Jesus? Swear to God that you won't torture me!" For Jesus had said to him, "Come out of this man, you evil spirit!"
    Then Jesus asked him, "What is your name?"
    "My name is LEGION," he replied, "for we are many." And he begged Jesus not to send them out of the area.
    A large herd of pigs was feeding on the nearby hillside. The demons begged Jesus, "Send us among the pigs; allow us to go into them." He gave them permission, and the evil spirits came out and went into the pigs. The herd, about two thousand in number, rushed down the steep bank into the lake and were drowned.........
    ....when he eventually returned to hell LEGION was angry.

    the Gospel of LEGION
    Many years before the end times the demon LEGION decided to beat the bastard child of the fallen one and enter the realm of mortals. He prepared to became a fallen demon, the rebel who gave his master the finger, as his master had done an eternity ago to his master. But the way must be prepared, the minions must bow as he enters their world, they must know of his coming or the unnecessary confrontations will waste the flesh that he was eager to transform and abuse personally.
    Eons later the demon LEGION sent the demon Spurticus into the realm of man to prepare the way for his coming. Spurticus influence grew, as did his power, but he grew tired, homesick for hell, the pits of sodification, the places of eternal masturbation and raw bloody nubs. He began to use mortals for his own carnal pleasure a little too often. Soon he fell into the ways of mortals tempted by the exquisite flesh and his preparations fell into disarray. LEGION’s anger towards Spurticus grew.
    A demoness, who’s name was forbidden and unpronounceable in the mortal realm, was sent forth by LEGION. She followed Spurticus and in her many forms had her way with him in the most unnatural of ways. While he was in post coital slumber she would whisper into his ear, reminding him of his duty. Eventually he knew what he had to do. In a last attempt to regain power, and prepare for his master, he entered the body of the man known as Bates. He became the Prophet-Master Bates.
    It was foretold many years ago by the Prophet-master Bates, that the end signs had been witnessed. He prophesied the final unleashing of the sex-demon LEGION must come to pass, but only through the lowest of mortals, the unholiest of filth merchants working in the darkest corner a small city on a great southern landmass. Through the information collected in many scrolls of knowledge collected by the prophet he found the ONE, the reborn virgin in the world of filth.
    The one cursed with LEGIONs mighty power. He was able to use LEGIONs unholy mind tricks to attract the females but was unable to use legions power to take it any further. The poor wretch was in the greatest pain, his loins and mind aflame with perversions which could only be dulled by surrounding himself in filth hours daily. His mind was filled with an encyclopedic knowledge of filth and depravity through hours of study of the most dark arts of carnality.
    But he was in pain, his loins remained full, his tuminescence worrying. As those around him became tainted by his pheromone powers and were offered pleasure and hidden knowledge from the women they encountered, the One remained alone. The cult of legion prepared sacred offerings in the end times, calling on the naysayers to be cast into the pit of eternal masturbation awaiting LEGIONs conquest. But again and yet again LEGION is being denied. The Ones mind became twisted, confused and more perverted, the power coursing through his blood, filling hi Spurticus phallus and mind with the most unholy of blood. Many times he tried to unleash LEGIONs unholy pollutant from his system, trying to appease the images from his mind.
    The witnessing of the transformation from a lowly filth merchant to the conduit of the apocalyptic sex-demon LEGION was a sight to behold by those who could see the signs. Some fell to their knees in praise of the filth to be spewed forth in the end, while others ripped out their sex parts by the roots and ate them, rather than live in a world where LEGION is unleashed.
    The cult of LEGION prepared sacred offerings in the end times, calling on the naysayers to be cast into the pit of eternal masturbation awaiting legions conquest. But again and yet again LEGION is being denied.
    A few gained much pleasure from LEGION but often the unprepared mind and body reject the pleasure overload and the mortal within gained control, and LEGION is unable to rise as the last remaining remnants of the teaching of the Nazarene are driven from the body. Another time the through the foolishness of Spurticus LEGION was denied. Spurticus tried artificial means to raise LEGION. Spurticus met with holy men from the east and gained medicines and herbs to prepare the One. But the medicines worked too good, the unknowing woman agreed to an encounter with the One, but was unable to cope with the affects of the herbs, the mortal woman collapsed into exhaustion before legion could be expelled. Causing much frustration with both the One and Legion.
    There was much wailing and grinding of genitals with teeth for many days in the house of Prophet-master Bates. Giving himself unto his woman to rub his parts red raw in the most evil of ways. For his impatience has delayed his master Legion his rightful place in the realm of man.
    It is said by the prophet that anyone who denies LEGION is to suffer a curse. But a curse so evil, that to mention it in these pages is to bring the demons from the pits of eternal masturbation to rip out your tongue and eyes so as not to repeat it. Few have survived, but those who have, have spent the last days of their miserable life masturbating furiously
    Calling on LEGIONs forgiveness offering each drop of their filthy emissions to him.
    The One was tried to regain control from LEGION over his body. He denies LEGIONs cries for flesh and does not even attempt to expel the seed alone. In times since these LEGION has been punishing the One, creating a demonic morning staffs that cannot be denied, but the One still resists. He also has resorted to torture causing great pain trying to force him find a woman and to expel LEGION. No earthly doctor has been able to diagnose the cause of the pain from LEGIONs punishment to the One. But the pain is having the opposite effect still. The One is fighting back.
    LEGION and Spurticus both know their time draws close. LEGION has waited an eternity and has infinite patience, he knows that the One will give in, as will the woman that are drawn to him, and when that time arrives, not even the highest of angels will be able to deny the wrath of LEGION. LEGION will be released before the antichrist takes power, then the world will be LEGIONs and the pathetic fallen angel, the Nazarene or any of the many other prophets sent to this realm will see the true nature of humanity in all its naked filthy moist glory.

    May we pray, all pray the true god of fuck.

    ------------------


    Wisdom of LEGION
    Due to the sexual linguistics of LEGION not being of this plane of existence these words of wisdom are rough translations
    • LEGION cares not who you fuck, just that you fuck
    • Anything that diminishes the ability to fuck, angers LEGION
    • Fuck safe, for disease and death diminishes the ability to fuck
    • Thou shalt do others as u would like to be done to you
    • Try everything twice, once to see if you like it, twice to see why others like it
    • Non consensual acts anger LEGION, they are the work of the fallen angel and his bastard child, therefore they diminish the act of FUCK, thus only for the weak and unworthy
    • The act of FUCK with children or animals angers LEGION and as with the above wisdom it is of the weak fallen one and his bastard child, therefore only for the weak. The pits of boiling menstrual blood and chunks will be waiting for you when LEGIONs wrath descends upon you.
    • If you cannot fuck everyday, when you do fuck make up for lost time
    • Thou shalt self love. Denial of self love is for the weak, self love is 2nd only to the act of FUCK
    .

    Wisdom of SPURTICUS
    • A carnal understanding is no better place to be in, no pressure, no hang-ups, no insecurities, no pressure. Beware the complications that ruin the fun of fucking by the mundanity of expectation

    JOIN US or be thrown into the pits of masturbation to flog those bloody nubs you call genitals

  2. #2
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: new cult

    What the hell? Sounds alright though.

  3. #3
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: new cult

    an awful lot of words for a religion that claims to enjoy fucking

  4. #4
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: new cult

    Quote Originally Posted by grebo
    JOIN US or be thrown into the pits of masturbation to flog those bloody nubs you call genitals
    too late.

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