I have a new little devil
I had a lil boy about six weeks ago...
what can a person do to ensure their kid grows up to be a decent human being ???
(obviously my parents missed something:) )
Re: I have a new little devil
Well, I have two-year old twin girls. There's not much I can tell you besides be yourself, and have eternal patience, expecially while he's an infant.
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by cheinara wraithwalker
Well, I have two-year old twin girls. There's not much I can tell you besides be yourself, and have eternal patience, expecially while he's an infant.
the patience thing ive learned...it has always been my weak spot....
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pull~My~Hair
the patience thing ive learned...it has always been my weak spot....
Yeah, I don't know too many people that are born with patience. You'll need it just about every night with an infant. His sleep schedule is going to be way different than yours, but just keep thinking to yourself "In just five months, it'll be better." Seriously, first 6 months are hell, but worth it. Once they get a little bit older, that's when you'll have to watch yourself. They start to pick up on EVERYTHING, and they're very sensitive to their parents emotions. Try not to fight in front of him. If you don't want him cussing at a young age, etc. You probably know all this, but I'm just saying. :)
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by cheinara wraithwalker
Yeah, I don't know too many people that are born with patience. You'll need it just about every night with an infant. His sleep schedule is going to be way different than yours, but just keep thinking to yourself "In just five months, it'll be better." Seriously, first 6 months are hell, but worth it. Once they get a little bit older, that's when you'll have to watch yourself. They start to pick up on EVERYTHING, and they're very sensitive to their parents emotions. Try not to fight in front of him. If you don't want him cussing at a young age, etc. You probably know all this, but I'm just saying. :)
Yeah he has the 2 hour schedule right now, except hes up from 1am to 4 am, but at 6am is th time when patience is key, or I'd freak out....
actually yeah we need to curve our language really soon....:rolleyes:
Thanks:thumb:
Re: I have a new little devil
I don't have kids, but I was a kid and I remember things that my parents did and things that they didn't do.
I think it's important that you treat them as if they are a person and not just a pet. I know that sounds harsh, but that's the way it is with most parents. I remember it sucked being a kid because no one listened to you or took you seriously. obviously you can't treat them entirely as you would an adult, but you have to have the instict to know what to do and what not to do. a little respect goes a long way, and shit that you think is no big deal might mean a lot to a kid.
I think it's also really important that you teach them responsibility from a really young age. I you wait until they are 16 and thier first responsibilty is a job or a car then it's too late. if they don't have any idea how to start getting by on thier own and who they want to be at that point, then they most likely never will and will always be the same way. this will show them that thier actions have consequences, other than just some arbitrary rules that they have to follow and get punished for if they don't, and see no results if they do. and even as adults most aspects of our lives still follow all these rules and most of us choose to ignore or follow them on our own discrection. kids don't know that, and they pretty just know whether it's fun or nor, and if they don't understand the rule, and they just see it as not beign fun, then they will probibly break it.
on that note, kids are usually smarter then you give them credit for. if people just tell them what to do all the time and make them feel stupid then they won't have any respect for those people, and probibly won't listen to them. i'm not saying this is neccesarily the right thing to do, but my parent's never told me not to do drugs and alchohol. they made sure that I knew about them but they never said not to do them. I think that if they had then I probibly would have just assumed they didn't want me to have any fun, since parents are always keeping you from doing fun things, and then I would have done them. Instead I knew it was my choice, so I actually thought about it and until I was an adult I never used drugs or had a problem with alchohol.
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by Morning Glory
I don't have kids, but I was a kid and I remember things that my parents did and things that they didn't do.
I think it's important that you treat them as if they are a person and not just a pet. I know that sounds harsh, but that's the way it is with most parents. I remember it sucked being a kid because no one listened to you or took you seriously. obviously you can't treat them entirely as you would an adult, but you have to have the instict to know what to do and what not to do. a little respect goes a long way, and shit that you think is no big deal might mean a lot to a kid.
I think it's also really important that you teach them responsibility from a really young age. I you wait until they are 16 and thier first responsibilty is a job or a car then it's too late. if they don't have any idea how to start getting by on thier own and who they want to be at that point, then they most likely never will and will always be the same way. this will show them that thier actions have consequences, other than just some arbitrary rules that they have to follow and get punished for if they don't, and see no results if they do. and even as adults most aspects of our lives still follow all these rules and most of us choose to ignore or follow them on our own discrection. kids don't know that, and they pretty just know whether it's fun or nor, and if they don't understand the rule, and they just see it as not beign fun, then they will probibly break it.
on that note, kids are usually smarter then you give them credit for. if people just tell them what to do all the time and make them feel stupid then they won't have any respect for those people, and probibly won't listen to them. i'm not saying this is neccesarily the right thing to do, but my parent's never told me not to do drugs and alchohol. they made sure that I knew about them but they never said not to do them. I think that if they had then I probibly would have just assumed they didn't want me to have any fun, since parents are always keeping you from doing fun things, and then I would have done them. Instead I knew it was my choice, so I actually thought about it and until I was an adult I never used drugs or had a problem with alchohol.
i get what you are saying...i think there has to be a happy medium...if you limit a child too much, when it is finally time for them to realise they can make their own desicions they rebel and make awful choices, so if they begin to make their own choices early they will be in the habit of making good choices....i agree
Re: I have a new little devil
One of the other things you have to look out for as a parent, is that kids will learn to manipulate you to get what they want. It starts really young. If you give them everything they want, when they want it, and especially when they cry, or have a tantrum, then it teaches them that if they have a fit, that you will give them love and attention. So it becomes a pattern that persists through adult life. You have to learn to give them what they need, but not always what they want... It's tough to do, but if you don't do it, you will have a spoiled brat...
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by TheDeathKnight
One of the other things you have to look out for as a parent, is that kids will learn to manipulate you to get what they want. It starts really young. If you give them everything they want, when they want it, and especially when they cry, or have a tantrum, then it teaches them that if they have a fit, that you will give them love and attention. So it becomes a pattern that persists through adult life. You have to learn to give them what they need, but not always what they want... It's tough to do, but if you don't do it, you will have a spoiled brat...
definately....I want him to live life minimally by choice...its sad how materialistic kids are
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by Morning Glory
I don't have kids, but I was a kid and I remember things that my parents did and things that they didn't do.
I think it's important that you treat them as if they are a person and not just a pet. I know that sounds harsh, but that's the way it is with most parents. I remember it sucked being a kid because no one listened to you or took you seriously. obviously you can't treat them entirely as you would an adult, but you have to have the instict to know what to do and what not to do. a little respect goes a long way, and shit that you think is no big deal might mean a lot to a kid.
I think it's also really important that you teach them responsibility from a really young age. I you wait until they are 16 and thier first responsibilty is a job or a car then it's too late. if they don't have any idea how to start getting by on thier own and who they want to be at that point, then they most likely never will and will always be the same way. this will show them that thier actions have consequences, other than just some arbitrary rules that they have to follow and get punished for if they don't, and see no results if they do. and even as adults most aspects of our lives still follow all these rules and most of us choose to ignore or follow them on our own discrection. kids don't know that, and they pretty just know whether it's fun or nor, and if they don't understand the rule, and they just see it as not beign fun, then they will probibly break it.
on that note, kids are usually smarter then you give them credit for. if people just tell them what to do all the time and make them feel stupid then they won't have any respect for those people, and probibly won't listen to them. i'm not saying this is neccesarily the right thing to do, but my parent's never told me not to do drugs and alchohol. they made sure that I knew about them but they never said not to do them. I think that if they had then I probibly would have just assumed they didn't want me to have any fun, since parents are always keeping you from doing fun things, and then I would have done them. Instead I knew it was my choice, so I actually thought about it and until I was an adult I never used drugs or had a problem with alchohol.
Excellent advice, fully agree. If I need a babysitter I'm calling you. :thumb:
Re: I have a new little devil
Re: I have a new little devil
i don't even like kids,but that picture is awesome...Congrats. :D :D ...
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by killerkat
i don't even like kids,but that picture is awesome...Congrats. :D :D ...
Lol thanks ....kids are an aquired taste....kinda salty:rryumy:
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by Morning Glory
on that note, kids are usually smarter then you give them credit for. if people just tell them what to do all the time and make them feel stupid then they won't have any respect for those people, and probibly won't listen to them. i'm not saying this is neccesarily the right thing to do, but my parent's never told me not to do drugs and alchohol. they made sure that I knew about them but they never said not to do them. I think that if they had then I probibly would have just assumed they didn't want me to have any fun, since parents are always keeping you from doing fun things, and then I would have done them. Instead I knew it was my choice, so I actually thought about it and until I was an adult I never used drugs or had a problem with alchohol.
very true morning....
i'll spin that with the other side of the same coin(what???,haha)
my mother,was kinda shy(not really) about her drug use(she was a Qualude queen, in her day),but she did talk about it/them it was always an open subject our whole lifes...mainly as my brother was growing up ,he's actually the one that go me into the whole world....
nowadays, the 4 of us can meet in TN every so often,we all have tripped,we all have done more goddamned drugs than whoever....
and we can talk positive about our experinces,we ,imho(just learned that),we are good people,very philosofic,good natured,ect,ect....
we may all be very low on the income scale,BUT that's where the big questin is anwered,WE did what WE wanted to with our lifes,we do what we love,we are happy about it.....
on the other side of things,we all learned,and some of us still learn good and bad of such things as substances,BUT we learned them first hand....and that's really the only way to learn them.....
not sure if that is relavent,or made any since,but there she is...
Re: I have a new little devil
Cool pic..thx for sharing
Re: I have a new little devil
Quote:
Originally Posted by Evilbink
Cool pic..thx for sharing
yup yup :)
