you can't take me anywhere

YOU CAN"T TAKE ME ANYWHERE

OK> This is the funniest thing I have heard in forever.

So last nigt I went out to sushi with a friend and ordered spicy vegitarian rolls. THey were really fucking spicy. So what do I do? Quench my thirst with 2 large saki's and a beer, of course. Needless to say I was pretty enebriated when we left and went straight home to my lover's house and went sleep. Honestly, I remember getting dropped off but not getting in bed. The older I get the more mixing alcohol screws me up. I think the events of this evening are evidence of that.....

This morning I woke up and went about my day as usual. My lover boy asked me "so did you figure out why that towel was on the floor this morning?"

"No", I tell him, "I was wondering though".

He tells me that in the middle of the night I get out of bed and go to the foot of the bed. He hears tinkeling and realizes that I am peeing on the floor at the foot of the bed.

"What are you doing?" he asks.

"Peeing" I tell him.

"Don't you want to go to the bathroom?"

(Sarcasm...) "Yes."

I don't know about the rest of you all but I have not peed the bed in around a decade. Granted, I actually peed at the foot of the bed on the floor but still, who does that at the age of 24? I laughed so hard I almost peed myself again.

Then, to top it off, I started having a violent dream a few hours later in the night. I was thrashing around and yelling and my lover tries to wake me, telling me I am having a bad dream. What do I do? Punch him. I flailed my angry arm at him and punched him.

You can't take me anywhere.....

http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a140/Scar1334/cs.jpg

What an adorable mental image. XD

You'll be needing diapers in no time!

Hahahahaaaaaaaa!!!!. I tried to pee on the bed , then tried on the dresser, before peeing in the sink in my drunken madness. This was the same night we hung out. Luckily Andy was there to direct me...but then again he could exaggerated part of that story.

What a pair you two make, your both cut off till you can control your bladders.

Christ. It's threads like these that make me glad I'm single.


Or as you fools put it "loverless" or "without boy-toy" or whatever other goofy shit...

Good Times

my brother used to pee in the laundry basket when he was a kid...
no clue why :S and he wouldnt remember it, he was sleepwalking or something.

My bartender last night was telling a story about how she was at a concert in somebody's basement and her boyfriend was talking about how bad he had to piss. So her drunk ass said "Why don't you just do it in my hands!" and she held her cupped hands out.

So the guy said, "Don't say stuff like that. I'm drunk and just might do it." and she kept egging him on. So he pisses in the chick's hands and she throws it at the dude in front of her who'd been a dick earlier.

When she finished the story, the dude sitting next to me said "I'm not letting you come see my band," to which I replied, "Fuck that, I'm not letting you open any more of my beers!"

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Rockwulf

When she finished the story, the dude sitting next to me said "I'm not letting you come see my band," to which I replied, "Fuck that, I'm not letting you open any more of my beers!"

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Well played...well played indeed. :thumb:

saki's fucked me up weird like that before.... but never to the point of peeing the floor. funny story.

Would love to see that

suddenly, I really wanna get drunk tonite.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by kellie

Hahahahaaaaaaaa!!!!. I tried to pee on the bed , then tried on the dresser, before peeing in the sink in my drunken madness. This was the same night we hung out. Luckily Andy was there to direct me...but then again he could exaggerated part of that story.

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Well, that night you are talking about I called amelia drunk some time after midnight and invited her to eat then left her waiting until eventually she made other plans. I slept in the car all the way home (2 hours from that venue) and woke up the next day wearing my shoes and with no recollection of making it in the house. You know how to pour a tequilla shooter, girl :-)

haha crazy shit, Scar! I'm lucky I've never got that drunk before... yet... lol... I hope I don't, to be honest, but I *have* had some violent dreams after drinking.
I've elbowed my boyfriend in the ribs, I've headbutted him (not hard, and he didn't remember it until I told him the next morning "I think I may have headbutted you last night..."), and he's had violent dreams, too, he accidentally slapped me in the face haha.
His excuse was, "I had a dream you were falling and I went to grab you..."