Create a fortune cookie

Make a sentence for a fortune cookie of wisdom, thoughts or whatever.
I always wanted to have a fortune cookie generator based on the people I know etc..

You must appreciate failures, to appreciate your successes.

http://www.blogthings.com/fortunecookiegenerator/

heres one for ya..
boil boil toil and trouble...yep..your standing in lava

Uh yeah. I was aware of that one toots. We can get more creative up in here... than that thing. :p:

"A stupid person can do anything except think." - J.R. "Bob" Dobbs

"Be the iceberg, not the titanic." - Caitlin Burke

"Booze, Tobacco, Dope, Pussy, Cars." - the butthole surfers

"Cunnilingus" is a hard word to get your tongue around.

"Ethics? ETHICS? ethics, SCHMETHICS!" - arifel

"Frank... th' benzedrine's got my teeth wiggling." - Cain

"Hear with pain, ears are wounds" - blixa bargeld

"Hey ogre... d'you think it's time to go to bed?" - skinny puppy

"How do goths keep fit? Sir, Dancing and Fucking." - David Gerard

"I always thought Desade didn't go far enough." - arifel

"I hope no bad people turn up." - the beastie boys

"I was stupid, I was expendable, and I went." - Tasha Yar

"I'm a liar... and I'll keep lying. I promise." - henry rollins

"if wishes were horses, glue'd be cheaper." - arifel

"It may stop, but it never ends" - Matt Howarth

"Jesus... had days like this." - Cain, Robocop 2

"Naturally, I said to myself, but why?" - Umberto Eco

"Sex is a poor substitute for masturbation." - Quentin Crisp

"Stay away from the Christians; they are bad for you." - Cat

"There's never enough `with everything'..." - HST

"We don't DO drugs - we TAKE them." - Loki

"We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad." Cheshire Cat

... but the pension fund was just *sitting* there...

A religion is a heresy with an adequate army

About as useful as a chocolate teapot.

Act Like A Dumbshit And They'll Treat You Like An Equal

all i want is a warm bed, a kind word, and UNLIMITED POWER

an orifice is an orifice is an orifice

Apologise to me for daring to exist!

At the count of 1,2,3, humanity will snap out of it.

can't fight the seether!

Confucius say nothing - Because he's dead!

DO NOT LOOK INTO LASER WITH REMAINING EYE

for the life of the flesh is in the blood - Lev 17:11

God told me to set you on fire.

Half an hour of begging is not considered Foreplay

Happy Da! Birthday Ve!

hell is three virgos ordering a pizza

i can't stand another empty day inside this howling skin - s. le bon

I doubt that one's first fisting is to the elbow.

i know. i don't give a shit, but i know.

i want to dig up Bob Marley and smoke him.

I'd rather be sticking a pine cone up Winona's butt

i'm not real, but you are

If you love someone, set them on fire

Insanity LIES truth

It's not just a PHASE, mom!

MORE THESE KIND `PILS', "BOB"!

nequaquam vacuum (The void does not exist)

NORMAL is a setting on a washing-machine

Oh, cookie, cookie, cookie start with C!

Only 337,654 years to go until the end of the Kali Yuga

Rip Yerself a New One

Set Them Chickens Free!

Short is the pain and long is the ornament - Pinhead

the graveyards in haiti are very noisy

What i like is CULTURE! what i like is ART!

You should have listened to the voices in my head!

You're right, who cares?

"Is ev'rybody HAPPY? :)" - machiavelli

Weed ~PullMyHair:thumb:

Plus they now have a thing happening where you can order your own M&Ms to say whatever you want, If I wasnt poor id Buy BB m&ms

This message will self destruct in 10 seconds

Cat lady's live longer.

Hurry home...you'll catch him/her cheating!

Be the change you want...oh, fuck it. Do whatyalike.

There is nothing a pill can't cure.

In pain, there is clarity

Even with all the mayo in the world, you can't turn chicken shit into chicken salad

Merlot and email/blogs don't mix- (Life lessons on tlc)

Pass this fortune on to 15 people in the next 30 mins and you'll win a million dollars (aha! The chain fortune!)

Yes, you look fat in those jeans. He was lying.

~Man who stands on toliet, is high on pot~

~Brit with creme egg fetish, is in sticky situation~

~Candy from Strangers - now with 30% more razorblades~

~Poodle, The other white meat~

~That wasn't CHICKEN you just ate off that skewer~
(see above fortune)

~Babies are like tattoos. You see other peoples' & they're cool,
but yours is never as good & you can't get rid of it~

~Every man Should believe in something,
I believe I'll have another drink~

~If you can't fuck it or eat it - kill it, fuck it AND then eat it~

~I can do my job or I can care. I'm not paid enough to do both~

from Pynchon's Gravity's Rainbow:

Proverbs for Paranoids

1. You may never get to touch the Master, but you can tickle his creatures.

2. The innocence of the creatures is in inverse proportion to the immorality of the Master.

3. If they can get you asking the wrong questions, they don't have to worry about answers.

4. YOU hide, THEY seek.

5. Paranoids are not paranoid because they're paranoid, but because they keep putting themselves, fucking idiots, deliberately into paranoid situations.

I pee'd in your rice

is always my favorite

I'm sorry, Brad, but that wasn't me talking. You see, I am a Channeler for Mr. Chainsaw.

"ah cain't wait to whup a duckie's ass." - wesley willis

Power corrupts. Absolute power gets laid more often.

If thinking is too hard - quote scripture.

<Ctrl><Alt><Gerbil>

look, ma, the ranks of the heathen are growing!

"This rice is my family," "But I hate rice!" ha ha

My dick is one thing I won't fuck with.

sometimes you people act like i need a reason.

"I'm jumbing.. jumbing.. jumbing in the name of the Lord"
- Bob Marley

Nice