If someone makes a huge effort to befriend you . . .

If someone makes a huge effort to befriend you, how likely are you to be responsive?

Sometimes I just can't drag myself away from work and out of my shell long enough to socialize, even though I usually have a good time when I do it. I think it is healthy and good to connect with one's fellows, but mostly the good ones. Yet sometimes I totally drop the ball on hanging out with people I really really like who are great people. And other times someone kinda sucky will be so aggressive about trying to be pals that I will end up hanging out with them even if they want to eat low end food and talk the dullest trash in the universe. Then again, I'm a workaholic.

If someone shows all the outward signs of trying to make friends, how likely are you to reject their overtures if they seem like they might have a bad secret agenda and how likely are you to at least give them a chance?

don't think I've ever had that problem

I would be skeptical if I saw a *huge* effort. I get myself in trouble when I try to help folks that may simply be in need of attention. Subsequent ingratitude makes me bitter. I have to avoid such cycles with other humans. It is a waste of time.

Overall, though, I'm always open to good conversation. There are already people here I "hang" with, but my boundaries are quite strict these days. It's about my projects, my family, my cats, and me. All else is secondary.:thumb:

Jackie T

Quite skeptical. I've almost always find that when someone is making that much of an effort, they want something. I wish too often that they would just ask me what they want from me, and we could get it done with so I could just go home. *lol* I wonder why I don't have many friends. :D

i always feel kinda' alone when i'm with that kind of people... cause they always try so hard to be pals with you, even fakes a laugh or two, and it just makes me feel as if i was talking to a machine..
I don't really know how to explain it, but at the univerisity i always bump into those people... and now i hate them without even knowing why

I tend to feel, for the most part, as if I have enough friends. I also always, *always* trust my intuition.

If someone's attempts at friendship give me pause for whatever reason, I will avoid contact.

Extra friends are probably not worth being the target of someone's dumb agenda.

I read this quote a few yrs back," One who gushes badges themselves as insincere"
I was raised to believe that everyone has something good about them, ya just got to dig deeper in some than in others....
but thats a dangerous way of thinking. Most people are users. And are good at appearing sincere.
I think that true friends will accept your workaholicism and understand the weight of the empire you have on your shoulders, and assist in any way possible.... even if it means being understanding of your strain.
If they're in it for their own gain, they will constantly be making demands on you, and disappointed if you dont live up to their expectations.

If someone is trying too hard you have to notice and not feel too guilty about giving them the heave ho.

ive never had that problem either

people say i look like an asshole and theyre afraid approach or talk to me, lol

i guess it works out

i'm open about this... actually i give everyone an initial chance but make up my mind pretty fast if they're incompatible. if they're trying really hard that's kind of sweet. but then again I like unpopular unfashionable people ... like paris and ashlee simpson ... until they become popular that is. I myself am usually deliberately 180 degrees out of fashion which in fashion terms is actually completely ahead of the game... duh. i've no problem with popularity myself but don't like loads and loads of people personally I've noticed in a moment of self-analysis

yeah, I kinda wish that i did have people banging down my door. It's one thing if people are just trying to take advantage of you, but it's another thing to just say "im too busy." (even if you are) or whatever reason to not be freinds with someone that wants to be freinds with you, that really makes you come off as an asshole.

I really have about 5 freinds that I would say I'm close with. one I see quit a bit, at least once a week on average. one is truly always busy, and I only see him once every few weeks. the other one never wants to do anything and lives far away, so I see him more infrequently. and the last one I see about once every two weeks as well because of my busyness.

the last one is kind of what you describe. he doesn't have a car either, so he doesn't go anywhere, and he lives with his parents. so I don't really like going over to his house, it's lame there. we don't have much in common, other than we've been freinds since we were kids, and i'd feel like a jerk if I stopped being his freind.

then there's the group of people that we call each other freinds, but I don't call them and they don't call me and realistically I would never hang out with them outside of a group setting.

I think constructive friendship is fine. I like recycling, volunteer work, bicycle kitchen, working on my soon to be mine motorcycle (fingers crossed), art movies, acting classes, racetrack photography, shooting trade for my site, painting, reading...if someone wants to do those sorts of things with me that is cool. But often times some "friends" want to use me as their free shrink, or support their excessive drinking and bad selection in partners.

Example:

He is hot right?
No.
But I love them.
They won't change.
I know.
Then why stay?
Because I love them and I have been with then for x amount of time.

more beer, different night.

I am unhappy but I love him.
(Oh Jesus. Check please!)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Michelle Aston

Example:

He is hot right?
No.
But I love them.
They won't change.
I know.
Then why stay?
Because I love them and I have been with then for x amount of time.

more beer, different night.

I am unhappy but I love him.
(Oh Jesus. Check please!)

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funny,,, true... a real girl thing!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Michelle Aston

bicycle kitchen

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ummm.... we not know wot dis be?? sounds dangerous. i hope you are wearing a hair net.... watch out that you don't get hot fat in your face while popping gnarly bunny-hops... if your noodles get caught in the spokes you'll be sorry