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People always ask me if the gothic aspect of Blue Blood means everyone involved wants to kill themselves. I never know how to answer. I think the urge for self-immolation is more common than the average person thinks, but perhaps less common in populations considered gothic than most people think.
ive thought of it a lot, at times when everything was at its worst, or at the very lowest troughs of my depression (over that thank gods), but no matter how bad things are ive never seriously considered it. to me, suicide is the cowards ultimate surrender. sides which, odds are id fail and just make my life even worse :p:
and to top it off if i topped myself its would kill my dad and my nephew wouldnt understand when he grew up.
Hourly, but I always seem to talk myself out of it, logic rarely allows me to give in to the violent urges.
Also, my chick is hot, and would be sad, I would have to off her first to get away with it...;)
http://i65.photobucket.com/albums/h2...63e64fb8_m.jpg
My personality, at the extremes, is more likely to be homicidal than suicidal. I like me. Suicide is the last thing i would do. ; )
I'm only alive cause I have two kids to pay child support for.
Once they're self-sufficient, I'm eating a shotgun.
It usually depends how bad your life is at the moment. In high school, it seemed pretty shitty, and I thought about it a few times. But when life got better, I did not think that way anymore.
So I really think it has a lot to do with if you think you will have happier days at some point in the future. No one wants to live a miserable life. But I can handle a lot of miserable shit now, knowing that there is a possibility that one day, things will get better.
I just wish people who do get suicidal, or are feeling that way now, would go try to do something to change their lives around. How can changing your life be harder than ending your own life? If life is that shitty, how can going back to school, or moving to a new city, or quitting a shitty job, be any worse than if you are so miserable you want to die? If you feel that shitty, it's time to go someplace new. Go move to the other side of the country. Get a new job. Make new friends. See if you don't end up in a better situation that makes you happier. If not, repeat...
A lot of time people are unhappy not because of who they are inside, but because of the circumstances of their life. Try living in the woods if people drive you crazy. If you feel alone and ostracized out in some small town, move to a big city, and give that a try... Go try joining the army. Go try joining the Hari Krishnas. Try *something*. Don't just sit and feel sorry for yourself, and take the easy way out...
think about it lots.....though I don't have any desire or reason to, just something I do to pass the time
I think the thought, not the action, of suicide is more common than anyone is willing to admit.
I think the majority of people who actually do attempt suicide did not really mean to, they are in extreme emotional circumstances and just hit a point of no longer wanting to think and/or feel, so the idea of death makes perfect sense. It's not a conscious decision of "I want to die today", it's like "PLEASE, I need some peace!" When you are in deep depression or distraught state the most illogical solutions can suddenly make perfect sense, even death; add the inhibition release of drugs or alcohol and the thought often leads to action, and often success.
The ones who make the conscious decision that they truly want to die hide their intent, tie up loose ends and carefully plan their exit. The basic circumstances might be the same–as in illogical solution suddenly seems logical–but their intent is to actually die, not the result of a spur of the moment emotional decision.
The 2 mind sets are distinctly different; I know from experience. When I was a teenager I made an attempt; it was an overwrought emotional decision based upon the desire to be ‘anywhere but here' and having no other place to go. As an adult I made an attempt that was not an attempt: Again, an emotionally distraught situation with my 2nd husband, we had a beyond horrible fight, I was exhausted emotionally and physically; I couldn't sleep, my head was pounding, and that was all I was thinking: I want to sleep...I NEED to sleep...and I can't. I went into the bathroom, opened the medicine cabinet, grabbed a bunch of bottles, poured the contents into the sink, grabbed a handful and swallowed them. I wasn't thinking I was going to die, I was thinking that now I could get some sleep. Almost 2 years ago I nearly made the serious, yes I want to die and I am going to die. The circumstances were the same–an extremely emotional situation–but the decision making process was totally different. It was like that stereotypical Moment of Clarity; I knew there was an out, I knew it was permanent, and I knew that that was exactly what I wanted; and this sudden calm descended. I felt at peace and started planning the ways and means of a successful exit. I didn't take the final step because I had another more momentous Moment of Clarity about what this decision would do to my husband.
every time i drink too much , witch is a lot since i fell off my wagon 1 yr ago ,
but a last then i would be missing all the great and wonderfull ladies and gent here ,
and im a Slothfull SOB , < too lazy so i;ll just hold on too the last little meaningfull bits of sanity i have left ...so i picked the Occasionally for a strech
"she asked me if I want to die, I said of course I do sometimes. Anyone who doesn't want to die, must not really be alive." - cc
i used to think about this alot but as i get older the thought pops into my head less and less. I think the only thing that has stopped me is that A there is almost no painfree way to die so that would suck, and B if i go out evryone wins and i cant let that happen.
I do remember that I worked out exactly how to do it, a long time ago that is. Find a Tall Bridge, climb out on the ledge, take a whole shit load of tablets, so on passing out, I'll let go and plunge to your death, and I won't even feel a thing. If I want to make sure, I'll tie a rope to the bridge and make a noose.
Not that I would do it, that's just the plan I had worked out if I was going to do it.