No, that was telling. In fact, there's a woman who wrote a book that says you should use simple behavioural tricks, like training a dog, to train your husband. I do believe praise and withholding sex are involved.
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No, that was telling. In fact, there's a woman who wrote a book that says you should use simple behavioural tricks, like training a dog, to train your husband. I do believe praise and withholding sex are involved.
But my real problem is, it's tiring worrying about how the other person's going to hear what I say.
GUY: How's it going?
ME: Okay.
GUY: Cool! (thinks: alright)
GIRL: How's it going?
ME: Okay.
GIRL: *silence* (thinks: just okay? Why is he okay? what does this mean in the cosmic scheme of life? Does he like me less? More? Does he like someone else better? Is he down about his job? His mom? Is he maybe feeling depressed? Amber felt depressed and her therapist put her on Ambien. Maybe he should take Ambien. But what if that isn't it? How can I subtly ask if he's eating differently etc etc etc etc)
and I can't just say shit, I've gotta be like some chess Grandmaster, worried about what 20 moves ahead weirdness it's gonna get bent into. IT'S TIRING.
I have a very firm belief NOT to withhold sex to "manipulate"y husband, and likewise... since WE'VE employed that...our lives totally changed.
Intimacy in that form esp. shouldnt be a trading ground.
It causes distrust in other important areas.
I try to just go with the flow and not try to over think things (I am prone to it naturally as well) but usually when I over think things, I defeat myself, being my own worst enemy.
An attitude that does you, and MANY other women, credit.Quote:
Originally Posted by OrganizedKhaos
Thank you.
I actually had my husband's mother instruct me to withhold sex until he named my son after HER MAIDEN NAME by surname.
If my son was going to have a surname it would have been with MY surname.
Thanks once again for appreciating that.