worst breakup lines of all time

so i was just broken up with this morning, after a year of being with someone whom i thought myself to be happy with & maybe someone i wanted to be with for a very long time... i guess i kind of knew this was going to happen eventually, but kind of chose to ignore it. what really kind of pisses me off though, is that he told me "i'm not what you need, i don't make you happy". shouldn't i be the one who decides that? it's almost as bad as my first boyfriend in 9th grade whose excuse for breaking up with me was, "you're too good for me, wait no i'm too good for you, wait, no i'm gay." the last of which is a viable excuse if it's the truth.

anyone else have any good breakup lines to share? i'm so down right now i'm drowning in my own snot. make me feel not-so-alone.

and if this was already a thread once, then i'm sorry. i didn't see one right off :thumb:

Yeah, that's a variation on the old "It's not you, it's me" line. I've gotten that one more than once.

Sorry to hear your in the dumps. Look, your a total catch and that bum who just broke your heart doesn't know a good thing. The only up side is at least he isn't wasting anymore of your time if he wasn't happy.

-comfort-

I pity the fool that dumps Sara - he clearly has problems spotting success when it's standing in front of him, so his life is gonna be such a smooooooth ride.

Dumping lines.. ooh there are loads I've heard being used that have that frissance of extra hoofage....

Try these for starters:-

- My dog isn't getting the attention he needs.
- My boss thinks you're affecting my work.
- Now I know you, I don't like you anymore.
- I want to stay friends, but I doubt even that will work.
- Your mother says she can't live with the deception.
- I can't afford to keep you in the style you've become used to
- we were dating? since when?

mG

-Now I know you, I don't like you anymore.

lol damn

ugh *hugses*
that sucks ass.

Sorry to hear that Sara. But if you said you figured it was coming...at least it's over with instead of dreadfully awaiting it, you know? =/



Mindgames, are those examples of one's that have actually been used? On yourself?

want me to beat em up sweets?:fight2:

"it's nothing physical..."

...and who hasn't used "it's not you, it's me"?

oh, and btw.... i'm sorry that you got dumped Sara.

guys are supposedly not good at breakups.

can anyone think of what a "good breakup" woulld be?

don't worry Sara, you'll find someone better!

"I gave you herpes. It's over."

Okay, I made that up.

Group hug for Sara!

The best breakups are when they at least do it to your face. Not in a restaurant or club. Not in an E-mail. Not in a voice mail. Not in a text. Not through a friend. Be a man (or a woman) and tell them face to face, in private.

I've had TONS of good 'lines' used on me...although there have been some laugh out loud ones here...

One of my favs "You're too smart for me. Sooner or later you'd catch on to me. Actually, I figured you'd have caught on sooner already. Hm. Maybe you're not as smart as I thought..."

No shit.

"you're too good for me, wait no i'm too good for you, wait, no i'm gay." haha thats fucking funny. Im going to say that in its entirety to someone.

Sara - I officially volunteer to be your rebound. *grin*
That really sucks baby *hugs*

"we're too young ot be this serious"
"wait you're pregnant? *door slams, car starts* "
"i joined the navy- sorry"
"I moved - sorry"
"we got togethere before i knew your reputation. now go away please"

those all actually have been used on me. *sigh* hence the truth in the saying "most guys suck"

K

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Mindgames

- we were dating? since when?

---

Hahaha... I've said that...



I am very sorry to hear it wen't bad for you Sara. That sucks indeed.

- You're to fat for me to sleep with [anymore]...
- I thought it had been over MONTHS ago...
- She's seventeen, but really mature for her age...
- You're like a little sister to me...
- I don't love you...Don't leave me...I'm not attracted to you...I hate that I always end up with girls like you...Leave me alone...Don't leave...Its been over a LONG time...

Oh, I'm so sorry, Sara. That sucks. I don't know if this is a comfort or not, but you are world class and, if he feels like he doesn't have what it takes to really be somebody, he might want to bail before the difference in your potentials becomes actual in the way he fears it might.

In some respects, I really miss your part of the world. But one of the main reasons I moved when I did was that a lot of people, even those with massive potential, just didn't believe in their own possibilities.

And, let's see . . . terrible break-up lines. I'm sure I've never used anything awful, but here are some I've heard:

"I joined the Army and I've been taking other people out in your car."
"I just keep hurting you."
"I'm going to kill you."
"You were breaking up with me when I was on acid? I didn't remember. Can I still drive down to at least pick up my stuff this weekend?"

Okay, the last one implies that maybe I've used some unfortunate ones myself. Oh well.

hah shit... okay.. "im going to kill you" kindof... thats a little bit past a bad breakup line... kindof like time to call the cops maybe?

a kick in the nuts

LETS BE FREINDS


I can't be with you anymore... NOW UNTIE ME

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Lady Alias

Mindgames, are those examples of one's that have actually been used? On yourself?

---

They were used on friends (though some of the quotes may be a word off..). I don't think I've been that bad to anyone, but last time I got to keep the house so I'm not entirely altruistic!

Our producer told me one last night that he swears came from a bassist we both know, and it's gold-plated:-

"Honey, I write EMO. I can't do that when you're makin me freakin happy all the time"

mG

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by mmmcherry

hah shit... okay.. "im going to kill you" kindof... thats a little bit past a bad breakup line... kindof like time to call the cops maybe?

---

Technically the person who said that didn't exactly break up with me, but I did get a restraining order against them afterwards, so we couldn't see each other any more.

me: "okay, why are we breaking up?"
her: "you don't deserve to know"

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Mindgames

"Honey, I write EMO. I can't do that when you're makin me freakin happy all the time"

mG

---

o.0 How old was this person?

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Amelia G

Technically the person who said that didn't exactly break up with me, but I did get a restraining order against them afterwards, so we couldn't see each other any more.

---

"I'm going to kill you. So, want to go gab something to eat?"

People are crazy.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Amelia G

Technically the person who said that didn't exactly break up with me, but I did get a restraining order against them afterwards, so we couldn't see each other any more.

---

It's sad when people come between us and the ones we love.

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Lady Alias

o.0 How old was this person?

---

25-ish and well past his fifth breakup of the year. He was being honest though, I guess. Most times expired busbunnies are moved onto the crew bus and just disappear. It's one of the great mysteries of touring - where do the groupies get off the bus, where does the john on a Skyliner flush to, and why do drivers always think "wake-the-fuck-up braking" is funny.

mG

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Mindgames

It's one of the great mysteries of touring - where do the groupies get off the bus, where does the john on a Skyliner flush to, and why do drivers always think "wake-the-fuck-up braking" is funny.

mG

---

that's pretty priceless. now i'm going to be pondering the thing about the john all day long...

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Sara X

that's pretty priceless. now i'm going to be pondering the thing about the john all day long...

---

I am so sorry I am going through the same thing. Except this boy has broken up with me about ten million times over a period of eight years!!! I have outlived all of his other girls!!! He has said SO many break up lines to me, I can't even begin to tell you, but he comes back!! He keeps coming back...

I just had the big affair with him FINALLY after eight years, the same as you, for the past year, I thought we were finally gettin close, and then he broke up with me again. He is a coke addict and also has a 200 million dollar lawsuit pending against him, so I guess it is just as well that I am not really with him...

I mean, he is the king of all losers... But really handsome and charming... British. Blue eyes....

yay Mistress Jennifer!!! :banana:

we missed you!

...so what's the best/worst breakup line mr.limeycokepants used on you?

:popcorn:

" I found a girl who looks just like you, but is actually nice to me"

yes i used it LOL

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Buster Friendly

yay Mistress Jennifer!!! :banana:

we missed you!

...so what's the best/worst breakup line mr.limeycokepants used on you?

:popcorn:

---

Hi Buster!! Thank you!! Mr. Limeycokepants! I LOVE that!! THAT'S WHAT HE IS!!!

Like I say, he has actually said nothing BUT breakup lines to me so it is hard to choose the MEANEST of them... They are all so mean and so awful.

In the very beginning it was "What world are you living in? This is never going to happen" (He said that SO many times, "This is never going to happen" And then it DID happen...

Lately it was "I need space", which is just so yuppie and awful.

And then "Say goodbye... Say GOODBYE", kind of screaming it.... Horrible stuff.

But he is the subject of my script and book, so without him there would be no story. I actually turned him into a Vampire in my book and my script and he made a lot more sense. As a real mortal human, he makes no sense at all, but as a Vampire, he makes perfect sense...

I have to admit, writing the book and the script DID help a bit with the pain, but sure it still hurts... And then, he might come back.

So to Sara, if you are willing to take him back, he might come back. But most people would not want to do that. I don't think I want him back, because I have already written the book and the script and don't need him anymore, and he is just too darn mean, and then there is his cocaine addiction and the 200 million dollar lawsuit...

"I need space"....a friend actually told me a really good comeback to that one, but i can't write it... it's too wrong. :1orglaugh (i mean just plain sick, so nope.)

i once told a girl "look if you want to just be friends with me, we're going to need to start having alot more sex. you're really annoying." ...AND IT WORKED

:confused:

then she got all mad at me when i started dating someone else...


eh. you don't need that guy MJ. find a "nice" boy who'll be mean to you, but with out the drugs, and legal hassles... haha. sorry.

"I love you but I don't really like you"

i love you, but im not IN love with you...lame

Quote:

---

Originally Posted by Buster Friendly

"I need space"....a friend actually told me a really good comeback to that one, but i can't write it... it's too wrong. :1orglaugh (i mean just plain sick, so nope.)

i once told a girl "look if you want to just be friends with me, we're going to need to start having alot more sex. you're really annoying." ...AND IT WORKED

:confused:

then she got all mad at me when i started dating someone else...


eh. you don't need that guy MJ. find a "nice" boy who'll be mean to you, but with out the drugs, and legal hassles... haha. sorry.

---

Actually I got it wrong, he said "I need time". Then it took him two months to actually tell me that he had moved another girl into his house the day after he had sex with me and took all of the silk pajamas that I had bought him, and washed and ironed for him!!!!

He has said so many breakup lines that I would have to write a book and a script to include them all in the right context (wait, I did that...)

Anyway, this has been going on for eight years.... BUT, the script and the book that I wrote about him has so many bigshot publishers and film people interested that there MUST be some kind of something here.

Maybe it's the kind of thing that only exists as an art form, but not in reality. Like when an actor has a role that is successful, but his life is a mess... Sometimes fantasy can BECOME the reality, and reality means nothing.'

When I try to live life as a girl or a woman it makes no sense. But as a kind of edgy artist, it is a really great life... But it's not easy to live that way, as an artist, writing about things, kind of apart from your own life. But sometimes you have to do that.

My ex, the asshole, didn't give an excuse he just left me for a guy who was hotter than he was. Damn them all

Actually just recently my exboyfriend broke up with me. These were his fun ones:

"Im not really the age I told you, Im 18"
"Im not ready to grow up"
"You scare me, but I love you"

Now I have a hot little 19 year old who adores me. His loss...

"you scare me but i love you"

heh i kinda like that one... sexeh :D

belgh! breaking up sucks, on both sides!!!

Once I was half way through my third date with this guy and I decided I no longer liked him and I didn't want to go home with him as planned. I told him I was tired and was gonna go crash on my friends couch. Instead I went with her to an after party and took some... drugs.... and got naked in the swimming pool. I think she had me pressed up against the rocks in the deep end when he walked into the back yard. He just looked at me, baffled, then tried to take my other friend home.

He is such a sweet heart that he never held a grudge.

mmmmmm naked swimming pool... rocks... naked... *drool*