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Thread: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

  1. #1
    Vexbeast's Avatar Eat me, I'm nutritious.
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    Default Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    One of my favourite threads to make on forums... tends to get some very mixed reactions. <.<

    Although here I'd expect it'll simply be segway'd.



    Step 1) Every time you see a smoker, tell them they will die of cancer.

    Step 2) Take pictures of people littering. Be sure to make them notice you doing so. To take it even further, walk up to them and ask if you can get a picture of them smiling while holding the rubbish. If they ask why, claim it's for a sociology project.

    Step 3) Dress like a hobo and sit outside a racing track. Hold a sign that says, 'Will provide racing tips for food.' Ask anyone who looks sad if they just lost a bet, and if they reply yes, tell them, "Don't worry, losing gets easier over time."

    Step 4) If your neighbours keep you up partying all night, go over to their house early the next morning and ask to borrow a cup of sugar. Act cheerful, loud, and most of all oblivious to their hangovers.

    Step 5) Tape domestic squabbles and make a remix from them. Proceed to play the remix on full volume at random times in the day.


    Feedback? Discussion? Further suggestions?

  2. #2
    Dusk's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Sick of neighours racing uo and down your street because they think their car is awesome? Put it on cinder blocks, slit the top open and fill with quick dry cement, they wont be racing/doing burnouts or screeching around corners

  3. #3
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Civility is almost an act of dissent these days. Assuming it isn't poisoned with passive-animus, it is the exception to the rule in many situations.

    OEC

  4. #4
    Vexbeast's Avatar Eat me, I'm nutritious.
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Quote Originally Posted by Dusk
    Sick of neighours racing uo and down your street because they think their car is awesome? Put it on cinder blocks, slit the top open and fill with quick dry cement, they wont be racing/doing burnouts or screeching around corners
    I know a trick I've always wanted to try...

    You grab a can of shaving cream, freeze it, then cut a whole in the can and put it in someone's car. As the car heats up, the cream expands and can apparently fill the entire car.

    My curiosity is so taunted...

  5. #5
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    I try.

  6. #6
    Junior_Diablo's Avatar Junior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    bugudadhyu daddy?

  7. #7
    VoltaireBlue's Avatar just is
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    I think the world would be a much better place if people just minded thier own business. don't worry about other people, worry about yourself. If someone said that to me when I was smoking, i'd flick my lit cigarette in their face. In fact, almost everything you listed is a really good way to get your ass kicked. mind your own business.

  8. #8
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    well the difference is being a jerk isn't against the law, but assaulting people is.

    the rational seems to be finding ways that are satisfying, but relatively harmless to deal with other people that are being obnoxious jerks. So while you may be being a jerk as well, at least you have a sense of humor.

    the problem with "minding your own business" as Voltaire says, is that people have a tendancy to regard thier business as a one way street. For example you consider it your right to smoke and an imposition on you for someone to tell you not to. But on the other foot, someone who chooses not to smoke considers it a put out on them to have to breath in someone elses second hand smoke. Our businesses have crossed paths, and either way someone is going to be dissatisfied with the situation.

    Of course the grown up mature thing to do would be to find a mutual, reasonable compromise for both parties. But we all know that doesn't happen very often.

  9. #9
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    I'm the kind of guy when in traffic and someone honks at me my first inclination is to stop the car in the middle of the road and get out, punch out thier windsheild and choke them for a few seconds. but my second thought is that doing that will end up very badly for me, so I usually just be the bigger person and let situations go without confrontation because a minor inconvience now will save from a much worse one later.

  10. #10
    VoltaireBlue's Avatar just is
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    I agree about second hand smoke indoors, but if I'm outdoors, than anyone who says that is just rude.

  11. #11
    Vexbeast's Avatar Eat me, I'm nutritious.
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Like I said, mixed reactions. O__o

    I don't understand why people take this thread seriously in the first place, it's not like anyone would be brave and bored enough to do all this.

    And Voltaire's reaction shows that the media's idea of barraging people with negative information doesn't make the world a better place. ^^ Which is why this thread is a joke in actuality, but like MG said, the sad truth is minding your own business doesn't work.

    Not that anything 'works' in respect to humanity.

  12. #12

    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Going out of your way to change other people's behaviour has always struck me as an eminently impractical approach to 'improving the world'. If only the problem of people not doing things the way you'd prefer them to were as easy as grossly exaggerating the consequences, we could all live neatly synchronised and avoid such silliness!

  13. #13
    Ali Stardust's Avatar Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    i wanna try that shaving cream thing though i am told it wont work it would still make a mess

    i have been kept up by very loud neighbors they finally shut up around 4am i began blasting classical music at 7am

  14. #14
    Dusk's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    My advice with the shaving cream is to uese more than one can and put a bonus can in the glove box.

  15. #15
    Vexbeast's Avatar Eat me, I'm nutritious.
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    I have serious doubts about one can filling up a whole car, which is mostly the reason I want to try it, actually...


    That said, it would be even funnier to leave the windows slightly down and jam so many cans in that it all flows out the windows... X3

    This idea appeals to my devious side far too much... <.<;

  16. #16
    Bikerpunk's Avatar Ill-intentioned bad apple
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Quote Originally Posted by Vexbeast
    I know a trick I've always wanted to try...

    You grab a can of shaving cream, freeze it, then cut a whole in the can and put it in someone's car. As the car heats up, the cream expands and can apparently fill the entire car.

    My curiosity is so taunted...
    It doesn't work, Vex.

  17. #17
    Rockwulf's Avatar Negatory
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Yeah shaving creams and gels break down over time as well. Just squirt a little on your bathroom sink and leave it for an hour. Sure their car will be a sticky mess until they can hose it out but you won't have some hillarious mountain of shaving cream erupting out of a car.

  18. #18
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    since things expand in a fixed volume from liquid to solid, wouldn't that just make the can explode when you freeze it, like a soda pop does?

  19. #19
    mystoo's Avatar Pirate Hooker
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Ok, I have a bit of an evil side to me. If I find something that really annoys the shit out of someone I know, I will use that to constantly, annoy the shit out of them. And then I watch them get all frustrated, and I laugh. I told you. ...evil. I don't know why I do it and I fully realize what an asshole I am.
    But I don't do things on purpose to be jerky to people I don't know. I don't wanna get beat up.

  20. #20
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    I used to be into 'making the world a better place'............................why bother? everyone likes it the way that it is

  21. #21
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    I think you got the backwards. everyone thinks that it sucks. show me a human being that doesn't like to complain about the state of the world. you don't hear cockatoos bitching about it, they ujust want to eat yummy crackers.

  22. #22
    Vexbeast's Avatar Eat me, I'm nutritious.
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Quote Originally Posted by mystoo
    But I don't do things on purpose to be jerky to people I don't know. I don't wanna get eat up.
    YUMMY. -Nibble-

    Quote Originally Posted by Morning Glory
    IYou don't hear cockatoos bitching about it, they just want to eat yummy crackers.
    I know a few people like that. But they're sure not everyone in the world... <.<

  23. #23
    Ali Stardust's Avatar Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    everyone dose bitch about it but hardly anyone dose anything so it makes you think they do like it the way it is

  24. #24
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    I wouldn't say they they like it, just that they dislike the possibility of thier actions leading to a lifestyle that is more inconvenient or shitty than thier present one.

  25. #25
    Ubiquitress's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    step 3 step 4 hahahahahahahahaha
    pranks make for good stories and bring a little levity to the world,
    might i suggest for classical blasting" the planets"
    i think the most "evil"i ever did was to my sister who as a child was incredibly anal about her collection of weird avon perfume bottles on her dresser. i would remove a bottle noting its placement, its dust etc. and while she went screaming to mom about it i would replace it and redust it with a little kit i put together for that purpose so when she returned with judge and jury nothing was amiss .made her feel crazy made me feel like i was helping her detach from the material world plus i found it hilarious.what can i say it was my ninja awakening ha ha ha

  26. #26
    DonkeyMoses's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    A jerk? sometimes, maybe. A creep? Definately. I used to frighten people for a living and as a hobby. A creepy grin and a six inch prosthetic toungue can startle a person enough to expand their perspective and bolster them for more serious threats down the line.

  27. #27
    Junior_Diablo's Avatar Junior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Yea!!

  28. #28
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Make the world a better place by being a jerk...

    Quote Originally Posted by Morning Glory
    I think you got the backwards. everyone thinks that it sucks. show me a human being that doesn't like to complain about the state of the world. you don't hear cockatoos bitching about it, they ujust want to eat yummy crackers.

    I think a large percentage of people don't know how to do anything else but complain......................take that away and you leave them with nothing................don't know why but most people are uncomfortable with contemplating the void


    hhnhh...........I'm starting to ramble

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