can you tell a funny joke?

[Blitz]

as we all know everybody love's a good joke,and i love to learn new one's,so please,if ya think ya know a good one tell it.I got one,you might have heard it,but fuck it:
a guy(newfie) walk's down a beach and meet's
a woman with no arm's or leg's and start's a
conversation with her,hour's go by and things
seem to be going well when she say's it's been
a long time since she's felt a man's touch and
ask's him if he'll hold her, he say's "of course",
to that she say's "i have'nt been kissed for so
long,would kiss me?",he agree's and give's her
a passionate kiss,she almost go's insane with
lust and screams "fuck me,fuck me, i wanna
be fucked", so he grab's her and throws her
in the water and say's"now your fucked"!

[inox]

I've probably told this one on here before, but it's short, and I like it:

Q: What's the difference between menstrual blood and sand?






















A: You can't gargle sand.

[Blitz]

lmao,fucken gross.

[CrAzEd69]

I took a lie detector test NO I DIDNT!

[Rockwulf]

What's more fun than nailing a baby to the wall?






Rippin' it down.

[Morning Glory]

So far the answer is No.

[Spiritinthesky]

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are stuck on an island. For years, they live there, and one day they find a magic lamp.

They rub it, and sure enough, out comes a genie. The genie says "since I can only give out 3 wishes, you may each have one" So the brunette goes first, "I have been stuck here for years, I miss my family and my husband and my life - I just want to go home." POOF, she is gone.

The redhead makes her wish, "This place sucks, I want to go home too." POOF, she is gone.

The blonde starts crying uncontrollably.

The genie asks, "What is the matter?"

The blonde said, "I wish my friends were here."

[OliX]

What's worse than baby in a dumpster?

Baby in two dumpsters.

[motormenace]

I've probably told this one on here before, but it's short, and I like it:

Q: What's the difference between menstrual blood and sand?






















A: You can't gargle sand.

Bullshit! I've gurgled sand many times......it just depends on what you mix it with, I know!!!!

[Toe Cutter]

Q: What did the Hick say while having sex?




A: Get off me Pa, Your crushing my smokes!

[Eclipse]

Hey guys, sorry I disappeared for soooo long :-(.... but saw this thread and thought it a good place to start posting again.

Why did the dead baby cross the road?
.
.
.
.
.
.
It was nailed to the chicken.

[Amelia G]

I've probably told this one on here before, but it's short, and I like it:

Q: What's the difference between menstrual blood and sand?






















A: You can't gargle sand.

Thanks, I needed that to start the day.

Now I really must get some coffee.

[DonkeyMoses]

What's brown and sticky?












A stick.

[jonny.illuminati]

What's brown and sticky?



A stick.

oh... i thought you were gonna say Mutton (...on Sundays...yay!)

[DonkeyMoses]

Nope. Just a stick.

[helcyon]

Reality.

Oh sorry you asked for a funny joke. my bad.

[Dusk]

Q. whats pink and orange and lies at the bottom of a pool?


A. a baby with its floaties slashed

Q. whats pink and orange and green?



A. the same baby 2 months later.