problem of the mother

[Splendid Splendich]

my friends i have the problem again. You all know about the topic of the penus and you thinks about poor ol' splendich sitting at home watching the Fillipino Ladyboy porn with his mother. Well my mother said i would win the talent competition but i didn't! and afterwards she hit splendich with the spoons and put those sharp things in the special place.

and the mother has lots of pig themed furniture in the house, every cup is in the shape of the swine and the handle is the erect penus, all the clocks are pigs and the little hands that go around and around are the swine penus, but i didn't know that the swine penus was so big until mother showed me pictures.

well she extracts the love milk from me because otherwise she says it would only make me fat. She has milk from the breasts, she told me never to tell.

my mother told me i would win the talent competition but i didnt. and my mother says i am hansom but i guess even the mother must have beef curtains? i thinks the gay boys likes to touch me when i am dancing on the disco with all the HOT LADIES.

the mother has the plastic bag sewn onto her and this is where all the shit and pissing goes, nothing comes out of the anus, well i don't mind cleaning out the bags for her, it is my job. and the penus is that horrible white/yellow colour again. my friends i know that you all feel my pain. what should i do?

lets discuss the whole topic.

[VoldtaEngler]

[Toe Cutter]

the mother has the plastic bag sewn onto her and this is where all the shit and pissing goes, nothing comes out of the anus, well i don't mind cleaning out the bags for her, it is my job. and the penus is that horrible white/yellow colour again. my friends i know that you all feel my pain. what should i do?

are you making sex with mommies po-po bag?

[MichelleX]

wtf??

[Pull~My~Hair]

[Toe Cutter]

[Erebos]

Please tell me I'm not the only one who makes more sense of the American Pres than this guy

[Baby_Switchblade]

Anyone else here getting deja vu?

[Lady Alias]

Hm. I think I am, Switchblade.

[Nudemuse]

You know this one time I was tripping really hard and I sat down with this tree and had the best conversation ever.

This tree was probably the biggest asshole I've ever met and to top it off kept rubbing sap all over my face. Ever tried to get sap out of your eyebrows? It's not good. I think it was trying to hump me or something. Which of course leads to the question of how one avoids splinters when having treeus coitus?

And then of course there's the issue of who's on top right? Right. Cause you can't really tell a tree what to do since their roots are bigger than yours.

We talked about a bunch of other trees. He said that Elms have bad attitudes and some Oaks have ass breath.

How does a tree get ass breath?

Too much shit fertilizer?

I was going to ask but I got caught up in noticing that the tree had the brownest bark I've ever seen. Really brown.

So then we took a nap but the tree was snoring so I had to go home.

This post has been brought to you by the Hijacking Association of America.

Would you like fries with that?

Thank you drive through.

[Baby_Switchblade]

Nudemuse, you fucking rule!

[mmmcherry]

nudemuse is my hero. i have NEVER read anything funnier about a fuckin TREE!!! HAH!!! i fuckin love it

[MichelleX]

ha! Too funny.

[mmmcherry]

nudemuse gets a pizza.

[Oil~Boy 26]

not just hijacked but boarded and made a bitch lolol
freekin sweet nudemuse

OB~26

[Nudemuse]

You are all very welcome I'll be here all week. Please remember to tip your waitress and remember kids, trees can be mean too.

[mmmcherry]

trees can be SO mean... especially when they leave their fuckin branches everywhere for you to TRIP ON!!!...
one tree poked my buddy hobson in the eye TWICE IN A ROW with the SAME BRANCH when he was a kid. he told me... it was fuckin funny hahaa...

[Pull~My~Hair]

trees are the ROOT of all evil...

[malcolm]