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Thread: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

  1. #1
    Shivvenfist's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    I was flipping channels earlier (rarely watch tv, and this thread will be one of the many reasons why) and an advertisement for Valtrex, a genital herpies treatment medication, came on.

    Watching it, the naturally flawless face of some non entity is telling me that "sometimes, I feel like whole days of my life are lost from outbreaks". What she means is, she cannot, in good conscience, fuck her partner without the worry of spreading the little warts named Wally.

    That was bad enough, but then, when I actually found myself sucked into the commercial like a cultist chanting "cheese whiz at night", the "side effects" get listed:

    "Do not take valtrex if youre immune system is not normal (thanks for making me feel good about who I am fuckwads!), due to kidney or bone marrow transplant, or ADVANCED HIV DISEASE...

    Uh...Let me think a minute. If I am infected with full-blown AIDS, and i know my timetable is slowly going away...would it be to much for me to say aloud to myself, perhaps to ensure I am smart about all this, and NOT BOTHER with trying to prevent a little wart-infestation? Imma die!

    At this point I turned off and unplugged the idiot box...

  2. #2
    HeadlessBill's Avatar Innocent Bystander
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    I saw an ad for a prescription sleeping pill and one the things said in the ad was "Side effects include drowsiness."

  3. #3
    gothic rose's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    Now i know that it's a good thing i don't watch tv, I'm not really missing much.

  4. #4
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    My favorite is the anxienty medication that has a listed side effet of "may cause anal seepage" I don't know about the rest of you but "anal seepage" would definetely cuase me to be just a little anxious

  5. #5

    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    With most any of the new Meds comming out the Side Effects are WORSE than what they say they cure...

    Here take this a cure for Migrane Headaches....Side effects may include: Drowsiness, Nausea, Anal Itching, Anal Seepage, Anal Swelling, Dizzyness, Rickets, Pregnancy (in some cases), Irritability, Diarhea, Dry Mouth, Rashes, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Non-Operable Lymphoma(sp), and Hives..

    Do not take if you think you are pregnant or may become pregnant, Pregnant women should not handle the pills, If you or your family have a history of Heart, Kidney or Liver Disease do not take this medicine. Always consult your Doctor, Lawyer and Local Mortician before taking such medication as extreme cases have shown signs of low life expectancy and irreversable brain damage....

    NOW...Me...I would just deal with the fucking head ache....

  6. #6
    gothic rose's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    Quote Originally Posted by -=Asmodeus=-
    With most any of the new Meds comming out the Side Effects are WORSE than what they say they cure...

    Here take this a cure for Migrane Headaches....Side effects may include: Drowsiness, Nausea, Anal Itching, Anal Seepage, Anal Swelling, Dizzyness, Rickets, Pregnancy (in some cases), Irritability, Diarhea, Dry Mouth, Rashes, Irritable Bowel Syndrome, Non-Operable Lymphoma(sp), and Hives..

    Do not take if you think you are pregnant or may become pregnant, Pregnant women should not handle the pills, If you or your family have a history of Heart, Kidney or Liver Disease do not take this medicine. Always consult your Doctor, Lawyer and Local Mortician before taking such medication as extreme cases have shown signs of low life expectancy and irreversable brain damage....

    NOW...Me...I would just deal with the fucking head ache....
    May cause pregnacy?! what the hell, i mean how the hell?

  7. #7
    keiko's Avatar baker of geekery
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    My favourite ones to complain about are the anti allergy medications that casue sore throat, nose bleeds, itchy/watery eyes, dry mouth, nausea and difficulties breathing. *shakes head*
    K

  8. #8
    Flip's Avatar Tea Drinker
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    http://www.sebourn.com/stupid/stprod.html

    not specifically medical but it just goes to show what kind of world we are living in if half of these labels are actually required

  9. #9
    Pull~My~Hair's Avatar makes your life seem good
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    my favorites are the ones that list the side effects then..".and in very rare cases death..."

  10. #10
    Belladonna's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    Quote Originally Posted by gothic rose
    May cause pregnacy?! what the hell, i mean how the hell?
    some meds make the pill less affective. like in my case when meds made my b.c.pills not work. now i have a three year old son. nicer of the side effects.

  11. #11
    gothic rose's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    No more drugs w/ weird side effects for me!! I don't want kids!!

  12. #12
    Eva:Gina's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    WARNING
    may cause boob saggage and anal leakage

  13. #13
    grebo's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    Here in australia we get crappy ads from the USA but they dub them with australian voices, its so fuckin obvious, and late night repeats of the same infomercials for shit like Tony Robbins stuff. That man is scarey lookin.

  14. #14
    Umbilical Lotus's Avatar Pregnant with Atrocities
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    Sometimes some of the American drug commercials leak up here to Canada, but unless you're watching a very American station you're usually safe. Unfortunately, you have to contend with Tim Hortons, Mr. Sub and Canadian Tire commercials, all of which are notable for being immensely annoying.

  15. #15
    Shivvenfist's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: "What the...? - When They Market Moronic THings"

    I'm also fond of the moron who sells his "Amazing Ebay Sales System" at 3 in the morning. Are people really that stupid? It boggles me.

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