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Thread: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

  1. #1
    Amelia G's Avatar chick in charge
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    Default Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals? What are the pros and cons of each, in your experience?

  2. #2
    Bikerpunk's Avatar Ill-intentioned bad apple
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Living alone: PROS

    Nobody to bother me
    Bathroom to myself
    Not dealing with others' dishes
    Can bring over whoever I like and can make as much noise with her as I like

    CONS

    Loneliness
    Everything depends on one person e.g. you're responsible for everything

    Living with PALS

    PROS

    They can sign for UPS
    They can occasionally get dinner

    CONS

    They're filthy, non-dishes washing folks
    They fuck noisily
    They stink up the bathrooms
    I have to hear their friggin domestic disputes.

    Living with a lover:

    CONS

    You have no time or space to yourself.

  3. #3
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Alone. I tended to really go overboard when I did so though. I've become a hardcore minimalist. Own no livable property now. Look for housemate situations (bit different than roommates). Respect privacy + sound proofing are key. You get the best of both worlds when you find the right situation. Won't go into living with someone as an s/o. It's been years and I generally don't contemplate it.

  4. #4
    Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I like to live alone and be able to invite guests into my space. I entertain often but it is still my castle.

  5. #5
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I actualy like living alone, but I really don't mind living with my girlfriend

  6. #6
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I'm definitely a pack animal...
    The extra housework sucks.... because everyone doesnt always pick up after themselves....
    BUT I'm happiest when my husband has a man around the house, and I have a woman....
    That way he doesnt have to hear about house work, and I dont have to hear about all the technical workings of man stuff.

    Seriously, the happiest we've ever been is when we live with more ppl than just us.

  7. #7
    mystoo's Avatar Pirate Hooker
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Undecided. Living alone right now for the first time in 14 years. It's pretty lonely sometimes, I really must work on being better company to myself.

  8. #8
    drewblood's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    living with pets is my choice (or has been for the last 9 years)

  9. #9

    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Alone is best I love my privacy

  10. #10
    a_small_death's Avatar The ugliest dj on earth
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Alone with my cat. Go figure that one

  11. #11
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I've never lived with someone romantically. that seems like a bad idea.

    I like being alone most of the time, but living with people is the best because if you want to do something you just say "hey, let's do something". but trying to track down people and organize and leave the house is a pain, so I just don't end up doing anything and feel bummed out being alone.

  12. #12
    VoltaireBlue's Avatar just is
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I live with someone currently and have for the last six years, but I generally prefer to live alone. living with roommates can be fun as long as I still have my own space. I'm a loner, and I really like my time to myself.

  13. #13
    keiko's Avatar baker of geekery
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    there are days when i day dream about a little flat to myself, where everything is exactly where i left it, no one borrowing my shit with out asking, making a mess in the kitchen while i'm out, no one using my coffee mug to soak their whatever in, no one leaving my wooden spoon in a pot full of water in the sink, etc. But then i get lonely and really like the idea of sharing a house with all my friends and just kinda hanging out etc. when i cook there's enough people to eat what i make with out having to refrigerate most of it to let it go bad later, i always have someone willing to play kitchen bitch in exchange for licking the beaters and getting the first cookie/slice/plate of goodies that i concoct. if the chores are distributed evenly (and everyone does their part *glares at the other female roomie*) there's a minimal amount of house work and parties can just happen on nights when everyone has the day off.

    living with family is the worst.

    i dunno if you'd say i'm living with a lover, as much as I love Dave, we're not remotely a traditional couple. we're not boyfriend and girlfriend, we're just happy. we're not together out of some obligation dictated by a title, we're together by choice and we both know that should one or the other choose to spend time elsewhere with someone else it's of no consequence to the relationship we have. and i do enjoy sharing a flat with him.

    ~K

  14. #14

    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by keiko
    there are days when i day dream about a little flat to myself, where everything is exactly where i left it, no one borrowing my shit with out asking, making a mess in the kitchen while i'm out, no one using my coffee mug to soak their whatever in, no one leaving my wooden spoon in a pot full of water in the sink, etc. But then i get lonely and really like the idea of sharing a house with all my friends and just kinda hanging out etc. when i cook there's enough people to eat what i make with out having to refrigerate most of it to let it go bad later, i always have someone willing to play kitchen bitch in exchange for licking the beaters and getting the first cookie/slice/plate of goodies that i concoct. if the chores are distributed evenly (and everyone does their part *glares at the other female roomie*) there's a minimal amount of house work and parties can just happen on nights when everyone has the day off.

    living with family is the worst.

    i dunno if you'd say i'm living with a lover, as much as I love Dave, we're not remotely a traditional couple. we're not boyfriend and girlfriend, we're just happy. we're not together out of some obligation dictated by a title, we're together by choice and we both know that should one or the other choose to spend time elsewhere with someone else it's of no consequence to the relationship we have. and i do enjoy sharing a flat with him.

    ~K
    I like it Cooking part reminds me of me I love to please others with stuff, specialy good food. *proud*

  15. #15
    Vaughn's Avatar Walking Sucker Punch...
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    singular

  16. #16
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Found out they really are selling my old place. Want subterranean soundproofing! Even with other humans. Even if I have to buy the damn thing!

    OEC

  17. #17
    Bedlamite
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I really enjoy living with my current beau. He isn't terribly demanding, he's generally quiet, and as for th normal day to day comforts, he doesn't complain or interfere with me. He's nearly impossible to motivate, which is killer considering I was just my OWN motivation for years... But that's ok.

    In general, I don't mind living with other people, I'd often much rather have something to entertain me. I'm a very spacial person, I need my own cave to go hide in, my own domain to 'rule' over.

    I think as long as I have one person I trust around me, it prevents my paranoia and weird little panic attacks, making me feel 'safe'. Alot of people I don't trust being around doesn't help the neurosis in the least, oddly enough. ^_^

  18. #18
    Bikerpunk's Avatar Ill-intentioned bad apple
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I don't think I could stand living with a woman again.

    Too damn demanding.

  19. #19
    Bikerpunk's Avatar Ill-intentioned bad apple
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?


  20. #20
    toxicat's Avatar catty member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    short answer: with my cats!

  21. #21
    TheDeathKnight's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I like living alone, versus with roomates.

    Roomates always cause problems.
    With lack of privacy, financial problems, mess issues, etc.

    Living with a lover is nice, if you don't have the issues like you do with a roomate. Like they pay their part of the bills, and they like things the same level of clean, etc. And they can give you time alone...

  22. #22

    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I really liked living with one of my best friends and his parents for awhile. We'd watch tv/play vids and both knew when we needed personal time.

    Was just nice having someone to do stuff with when you wanted to.

    Besides that I usually prefer living alone. Its quieter and I don't have fuckers playing rap music at 3am either.

    All depends on who my roommate is really.

  23. #23
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I'm definitely a loner, but I enjoy being able to split bills with someone, and have a living being besides my cats to talk to. Gives me the illusion of sanity. All in all though, I like to be able to practice music without worry of disturbing anyone else, and I hate having to be quiet during sex for the sake of someone else, just the same as I really hate overhearing other people. Especially girls faking orgasms. That's the worst (not to mention pointless)

  24. #24
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by Janiac02
    I'm definitely a loner, but I enjoy being able to split bills with someone, and have a living being besides my cats to talk to. Gives me the illusion of sanity. All in all though, I like to be able to practice music without worry of disturbing anyone else, and I hate having to be quiet during sex for the sake of someone else, just the same as I really hate overhearing other people. Especially girls faking orgasms. That's the worst (not to mention pointless)
    Can't wait to get out of this place. I have to blast my music not to hear 2 kids who can't fuck properly. They could at least break a rhythm and the chick not be so blatantly faking. ugh. 2 more weeks.

    OEC

  25. #25
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by toxicat
    short answer: with my cats!
    The right answer.

  26. #26
    DoctorZ's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by Janiac02
    I'm definitely a loner, but I enjoy being able to split bills with someone, and have a living being besides my cats to talk to. Gives me the illusion of sanity. All in all though, I like to be able to practice music without worry of disturbing anyone else, and I hate having to be quiet during sex for the sake of someone else, just the same as I really hate overhearing other people. Especially girls faking orgasms. That's the worst (not to mention pointless)
    For the sake of my sanity, I hope I never learn to tell when a girls faking. So much easer to think "Kay, she's done, I'm done. Now onto something more productive."

    And to make this post seem... you know... what's the word... oh yea, relevant, I'd prefer to be alone for the first few years, once I'm done school. 18 years of living with an asshole brother is enough, thank you very much. After that, though, I'm sure i'll pick someone up to pay the bills.

  27. #27
    Murk1's Avatar Junior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I am obsessive so I always end up living with my lover. If I like them enough to Fuck them, then I generally enjoy conversation, going out together, sharing my life stuff. I never was much for the one nite stand schtick.

  28. #28
    Tigerlily's Avatar Bang Bang Kiss Die
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I say living alone is best. Just from personal experience though. Everyone is different and it all depends on the kind of person you are.

  29. #29
    Bikerpunk's Avatar Ill-intentioned bad apple
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by Murk1
    I am obsessive so I always end up living with my lover. If I like them enough to Fuck them, then I generally enjoy conversation, going out together, sharing my life stuff. I never was much for the one nite stand schtick.
    That answers my unasked question: You're a girl.

  30. #30
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by One Eyed Cat
    Can't wait to get out of this place. I have to blast my music not to hear 2 kids who can't fuck properly. They could at least break a rhythm and the chick not be so blatantly faking. ugh. 2 more weeks.

    OEC
    Good luck getting through it. Seems like the shorter the time , the longer it seems. As a side note, the noisy fuckers lived downstairs from me rather than in the same apartment. The best part is that they finished together EVERY time. Like magic... Or distinctly like faking. I'm gonna stop talking about that now, before I have nightmares. Eew.

  31. #31
    Amelia G's Avatar chick in charge
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by One Eyed Cat
    Can't wait to get out of this place. I have to blast my music not to hear 2 kids who can't fuck properly. They could at least break a rhythm and the chick not be so blatantly faking. ugh. 2 more weeks.

    OEC

    You should post a note to that effect on the refrigerator door with a magnet. I hear that always helps in communal living situations.

  32. #32
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by Amelia G
    You should post a note to that effect on the refrigerator door with a magnet. I hear that always helps in communal living situations.
    Dear ____ , Learn to fuck Seriously though, this isn't a functional communal living situation. There is a difference between housemates and roommates. I just want to live alone at this point. I found another subterranean flat in an old Minneapolis mansion. This one is self-sufficient. As long as I amp up the tunes here, the annoyance goes away. It isn't the reason I'm moving per se.

    OEC

  33. #33
    Syrran's Avatar Pocket Puerto Rican
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    Quote Originally Posted by Amelia G
    You should post a note to that effect on the refrigerator door with a magnet. I hear that always helps in communal living situations.
    Oh GOD I hated that. When I went to college I was placed in housing with three girls who were all about to graduate. Me being the new kid I got little notes everywhere about stupid crap I didn't do. They'd leave notes about me leaving food out ( a box of cereal on the counter) but I'd come home to McDonalds bags and things all over the place. Things like that. My door would be covered with notes when I'd get back from places.

    Not to mention... Two of them were early birds with no volume control and one was a raging drunk slut bag that would bring home different guys ever night and fuck really loudly and rarely ever were the sounds less than completely retarded. I mean my god at least sound hot. Vaginal farts are NOT sexy... So no matter what time of day it was I'd have problems sleeping. They also told me I had to clean dishes even though I never used dishes, didn't own the dishes and usually ate over at my girlfriends house. I could never do laundry because they'd always be using it, and the drunk girl would wash her underwear in the shower and leave them strewn around the bathroom and on the handles and hanging and just ugh. It was a mess.


    I prefer to live with one other person, with separate rooms. I have anxiety and panic problems and I need my own space to have to myself to calm down when that happens. I get paranoid living by myself completely...and living with a boyfriend or girlfriend has always posed problems with needing my own place to relax...because it was always a shared bed.

  34. #34
    Bikerpunk's Avatar Ill-intentioned bad apple
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    Default Re: Do you prefer living alone, with a lover, or with a group of pals?

    I'm in a communal living situation. Best yet.

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