Should a man be required to support a child he did not want?

[Unforgiven]

I hate to show how much of an asshole i am to prove a point but sometimes it isnt the woman's choice...

there was a girl i slept with in college who was WASTED at the time of said debauchery (i was too, if that makes any difference)...but she told me to put a condom on, i told her i did but really didnt, and then bumped uglies without her knowing the difference...

if she happened to get pregnant would that change your opinion?

In the end the woman would still get pregnant and one of two paths would start.. she'd get an abortion (which then in-case you should help pay for said operation) or she decides to keep it and you pay child support (if you don't stay with her).

Different scenarios but they usually end with one of two ends, the third being that the two people fall incredibly in love and stay together which in-case the man wouldn't have to pay child support, but still support his child, which he would be doing anyway if he paid child support.

[Bikerpunk]

It sure is. The moment the rabbit dies, if she doesn't want to be a mother, she's one clinic appointment away from no longer being so.

[drewblood]

In the end the woman would still get pregnant and one of two paths would start.. she'd get an abortion (which then in-case you should help pay for said operation) or she decides to keep it and you pay child support (if you don't stay with her).

Different scenarios but they usually end with one of two ends, the third being that the two people fall incredibly in love and stay together which in-case the man wouldn't have to pay child support, but still support his child. Which he would be doing anyway if he paid child support.

oh right on.

so ur saying its ok that i lied about wrapping my willy?

i think im too drunk to keep posting in this thread.

[Bikerpunk]

It sure is. The moment the rabbit dies, if she doesn't want to be a mother, she's one clinic appointment away from no longer being so.

Let's flip this script. She gets YOU wasted, tells YOU she put a condom on you but didn't - she gets pregnant, and now wants your income for 20 years. Your choice is....

PAY UP

or lose your property, house, passport and driver's licence.

[drewblood]

Let's flip this script. She gets YOU wasted, tells YOU she put a condom on you but didn't - she gets pregnant, and now wants your income for 20 years. Your choice is....

PAY UP

or lose your property, house, passport and driver's licence.

fuckin bitch!!! i aint paying shit.

[OrganizedKhaos]

ewwww!


Karma will be a bitch.

[Unforgiven]

Unfortunately for you, Drewblood, it was your semen that fertilized the egg, so the Law says that you're going to help raise the child that you helped create.

[OrganizedKhaos]

"the child wasnt created alone" according to the hard to contest statement provided by women all over....

[Bikerpunk]

"the child wasnt created alone" according to the hard to contest statement provided by women all over....

You can be compelled to pay even if it isn't your kid.

[Unforgiven]

You can be compelled to pay even if it isn't your kid.

I think pity and guilt set in if you want to pay for a child that isn't yours. (Thinking she's going to have a hard-time raising a child on her own, etc.)

[Bikerpunk]

I think pity and guilt set in if you want to pay for a child that isn't yours. (Thinking she's going to have a hard-time raising a child on her own, etc.)

Or you were lied to and told it's yours

[OrganizedKhaos]

HOW personal of an issue is this to YOU?

You seem VERY emotionally involved

[OrganizedKhaos]

(you dont have to answer that)

[Bikerpunk]

My best friend had that happen at 15.

[Unforgiven]

That sucks hardcore.

Really hardcore.

I could imagine how traumatic that would have been at such a young age.

[Bikerpunk]

Fucked him up for life.

Got another acquaintance losing a house thanks to similar shenanigans.

[Unforgiven]

That's bullshit.

[Bikerpunk]

That's bullshit.

What is?

[Unforgiven]

It's bullshit that one human being would lie to another about something as major like becoming a parent.

[Cafe_Post_Mortem]

You know, I never wanted any of those parking tickets but I still have to pay for them.

Seriously, the system is fucked up and hard to fix due to many current attitudes, but it took a lot of years, decades of guys just saying 'fuck it' and wandering off without paying a dime for the kids they made. Now it's fucked in the other direction and it will take some time to unfuck it. That doesn't negate the responsibility, it just means the way we are enforcing it is wrong.

Honestly though, if I gave every guy who had to pay child support due to a tampered condom I bet I could still buy lunch.

[Amelia G]

You know, I never wanted any of those parking tickets but I still have to pay for them.

Seriously, the system is fucked up and hard to fix due to many current attitudes, but it took a lot of years, decades of guys just saying 'fuck it' and wandering off without paying a dime for the kids they made. Now it's fucked in the other direction and it will take some time to unfuck it. That doesn't negate the responsibility, it just means the way we are enforcing it is wrong.

Honestly though, if I gave every guy who had to pay child support due to a tampered condom I bet I could still buy lunch.

Maybe I have a skewed view because I live in Los Angeles, but groupies looking for a retirement plan are not particularly uncommon out here. Musicians and athletes are very susceptible to these sorts of shenanigans because the chicks know who they are, may invest A LOT in how hot they are, and they don't necessarily know much about the chicks.

Then again, I've also come across fat chicks with elf ears at science fiction conventions, hoping to get knocked up by a paid programmer.

If, as a society, we accept the notion of casual sex, then how do we deal with decidedly not casual consequences of it?

[kittywitch]

I think in that case, both should pay for an abortion. Both parties are guilty and a child should not have to suffer for people be indiscriminate!

[VoltaireBlue]

this is a very interesting question amelia. I don't have kids as we both know, so I thought about it for a couple days and came to this conclusion:
1. yes. a man should have to pay for at least half an abortion.
2. yes. he should have to pay child support or loose all rights of seeing his kid. I know if it was me, and I got pregnant, if he didn't want to pay child support I'd make sure he NEVER saw that kid. It would be my son or daughters decision to contact him at the age of 18.

sound a little harsh? well that's because it is. I saw my mother raise five of us all by herself, and that was really rough. raising a child on your own is just as harsh as the opinion I just wrote above.

[Bikerpunk]

I totally agree - there's no fair way to sort this out.

[OrganizedKhaos]

I think it all goes back to each person taking proper responsibility.