worst breakup lines of all time

[Buster Friendly]

what? those aren't reasons to break up with you Jax... those are just statements...

"I'm a born again, and you're going to hell! so you see, we can't really date anymore..."

"Wench, I will sue you with my team of highly trained attack lawyers if you ever mention we dated. to anyone. ever."

"I have more fun stabbing this effigy of you, with rusty soup can tops, than having sex with you. maybe we should break up."

..."I'm not ready to grow up" ...huh?

"Um... I'm oozing something green, and crunchy, with spines...you might want to go to the free clinic just in case..." (okay, so that one's designed to get her to break up with you first ...sorry.)

[LoraLie]

In the very beginning it was "What world are you living in? This is never going to happen" (He said that SO many times, "This is never going to happen" And then it DID happen...

That was one I've heard. (long distance relationship)

Oh and then when we sort of tried at it again . . . .


It went to

"you've changed"
oh and
"you're a whore now"

lovely boy.

[a_small_death]

Worst I've heard: "Is it because I never learned your name?"

[mmmcherry]

damn... that is pretty bad...
although with my ex... for the first like 2 weeks i knew him, i wanted to call him trevor... but he was travis... haha... dunno what i was thinking.

[the_darkness_calls]

worst one i've heard: you've helped make me an almost whole person so thanks, but it's over.... that, and "i wish you were dead so i could fuck you", although that one just made me break up with that person pronto...

[Satiate]

i've never dumped anyone, i've always gotten dumped myself... and it's always the same... boring thing that hits me out of nowhere that the basic jist of it sums up to say "we have this great thing... i love the hell out you... i never was in/wanted to be in a serious relationship before... i want to marry you... but i'm not ready..." bullshit then they come back within six months on bended knee and a ring... every single one of them, but two... and when i refused, they always end up married in a year... that is why i dub myself "the husband maker"

but through the years, i've heard some great break up lines from friends...

like...

"your sister told me you'd react this way... has she told you yet, that we're dating?"
"the money i'm spending on you is cutting into my party money... and if i'm not drunk, i can't deal with you..."
"i don't know how my dick wound up there, but i took it as a sign that we should probably see other people..."

break-up's suck, and i'm the worst person to give advise on how to deal with it... because i usually spend a good month or so in the bottle and a couple of months taking advantage of groupies... before i go into work myself to death mode...

[Black Spiral Dancer]

I've had the "I need some Space", "It's not you, it's me!", "I just want to be friends!"
I have broken up with a girl once that just wouldn't take NO for an answer, so one day when she said we needed to talk, I said "We have nothing to Talk about!" and that was that!