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Thread: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

  1. #1
    HeadlessBill's Avatar Innocent Bystander
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    Default Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    From correspondents in Basra
    July 11, 2007 05:37pm

    THE Iraqi port city of Basra, already prey to a nasty turf war between rival militia factions, has now been gripped by a scary rumour – giant badgers are stalking the streets by night, eating humans.

    The animals were allegedly released into the area by British forces.

    Local farmers have caught and killed several of the beasts, but this has done nothing to dispel the rumour.

    Iraqi scientists have attempted to calm things down. However, the story has spread like wildfire in the streets of the city and the villages round about.

    Mushtaq Abdul-Mahdi, director of Basra's veterinary hospital, has inspected the corpses of several badgers and tries to reassure Iraqis that the animals are not a new post-war arrival in the region.

    “These animals appeared before the fall of the regime in 1986. They are known as Al-Ghirayri and locally as Al-Girta,” he told AFP. “Talk that this animal was brought by the British forces is incorrect and unscientific.”

    Not everybody is convinced.

    “I believe this animal appeared following a raid to the region by the British forces,” said Ali Mohsen, a farmer in his 40s from Karmat Ali, near the air base used by the multinational force.

    “As we are close to the airport, they probably released this animal into the area.”

    British troops have been based in Basra since the 2003 US-led invasion overthrew dictator Saddam Hussein, and the 5500 that remain still face the threat of Shiite militias battling for the region's oil resources.

    They also have to battle the Iraqi rumour mill, as locals are quick to blame them for almost any calamity that befalls the area – including an apparent plague of vicious badgers with long claws and powerful jaws.

    British army spokesman Major David Gell said the animals were thought to be a kind of honey badger – melivora capensis – which can be fierce but are not usually dangerous to humans unless provoked.

    “They are native to the region but rare in Iraq. They're nocturnal carnivores with a fearsome reputation, but they don't stalk humans and carry them back to their lair,” he said.

    Both the scientists and the soldiers agree that the badger ought not to be a danger to humans, but so far they have failed to reassure the populace.

    “I was sleeping at night when this strange animal hit me on my head. I have not seen such an animal before. My husband hurried to shoot it but it was as swift as a deer,” Suad Hassan, a 30-year-old housewife said.

    “It is the size of a dog but his head is like a monkey. It runs so quickly.”

    Cell phone video of the badgers circulating in Basra shows a stocky skunk-like animal with long front claws.

    The honey badger, or ratel, is known as a brave predator capable of killing a cobra. It weighs up to 14kg.

    Sattar Jabbar, a 50-year-old local farmer from Abu Sakhar north of Basra, believes the badger can tackle even large prey.

    “I saw it three days ago at night attacking animals. It even ate a cow. It tore the cow up piece by piece. I tried to shoot it with my gun but it ran away into the orchards. I missed it,” he said.

  2. #2
    Black Spiral Dancer's Avatar RedHead Admirer Supreme!
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    Badgers? We don' need no Steenkeeng Badgers!

  3. #3
    Amelia G's Avatar chick in charge
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    I really don't think I want to know why British troops would need to travel with giant badgers.

  4. #4
    mmmcherry's Avatar CHERRALICIOUS!!!
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    i dont think they released badgers, i think they released drugs into the local drinking water supply...

    since when do badgers eat whole cows??

  5. #5
    ForrestBlack's Avatar Administrator
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    Here is a helpful guide from the Simpsons:

    http://www.whatbadgerseat.com

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    Mindgames's Avatar A guy who makes girls
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    Quote Originally Posted by Amelia G
    I really don't think I want to know why British troops would need to travel with giant badgers.

    cos it's harder to get a sheep in high heels through customs

  7. #7
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    this may just be one of the coolest things I've ever heard.

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    Mindgames's Avatar A guy who makes girls
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    And added to this year's list of "Things you never expected a soldier to say" we have a quote from a British Army spokesperson, Major David Gell:-

    "If you cornered it and poked it with a stick, then the smart money would be on the badger"

  9. #9
    Black Spiral Dancer's Avatar RedHead Admirer Supreme!
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    Badgers can be vicious little buggers! I wouldn't be cornering one and poking it with a stick!

  10. #10
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    [QUOTE=Morning Glory]this may just be one of the coolest things I've ever heard.


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    mmmcherry's Avatar CHERRALICIOUS!!!
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    love the what badgers eat site forrest, very informative... i thought for SURE the badger would go for the hot dog, but nope!!

  12. #12
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    I declare victory on behalf of the badgers. The war is over.

    Jackie T

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    evilstonermonkey's Avatar Please don't run away...
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    I disagree, Jackie T.
    consider what happened to the last nation to fall under a badger dictatorship. we dont want that happening again now do we? what do you mean you dont know about the fall of Blanderia?

    OH SHIT! the Badger Private Security Force is coming to get me! save me from the BPSF! LET THE TRUTH BE FR-

  14. #14
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    Quote Originally Posted by evilstonermonkey
    I disagree, Jackie T.
    consider what happened to the last nation to fall under a badger dictatorship. we dont want that happening again now do we? what do you mean you dont know about the fall of Blanderia?

    OH SHIT! the Badger Private Security Force is coming to get me! save me from the BPSF! LET THE TRUTH BE FR-
    2 Legs Bad. 4 Legs Good. 4 Legs + One Eye = Best.

    Jackie T

  15. #15
    badkittyamy's Avatar Crazy Art Kitten
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    I found this news article from weebl and bob and i thought it was a joke >_> Since you know badger badger and all that

  16. #16
    Morning Glory's Avatar Apathetic Voter
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    yeah, I was sure that it was fake too, but it was reported on BBC.

  17. #17
    One Eyed Cat's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    I support Al-Girta 100% *Hears knock at the door from Head of the House Inteliigence Committee* Uh sure I'll come with you Reyes when you bother to learn the difference between shia and sunni! (He admitted on tv he didn't know the difference) 'Til then I'm the Badger in Black, beeeeyatch.

    Jackie T

  18. #18
    shiki's Avatar nappy headed ho
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    perhaps its really chupacabras.

  19. #19
    mmmcherry's Avatar CHERRALICIOUS!!!
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    Default Re: Giant 'corpse-eating' badgers terrorise Iraqi city

    but... dont they eat goats??

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