Have you ever been disappointed when you met the members of a band you liked?

[Scar]

Have you ever been disappointed when you met the members of a band you liked?

I haven't ever liked a band a ton and then not liked them after meeting them, although there have been a few times I went to shows and was less into a band after a shitty performance. Siouxsie did that to me, and I coudn't listen to her for about 3-4 years after I saw her perform. Also, there have been bands I met in the LA nighclub scene who I didn't particularly care for. When I did get around to hearing their music my reflection of them as people overshadowed it.....

[Mr Karl]

one reason I'm not too into live music, I like the finished product

[Mindgames]

All the time - and it got bad enough that I used to refuse to work with someone I listened to, but it got a little restrictive on the old cash inflow front.. so now I just cycle my CD collection so I don't have them on playlist for a few months. There's still a few that break my system though, such as the guy who plays awesome lead but drunkenly admitted sexual abuse.

[Amelia G]

There is a book by a Hollywood producer called You'll Never Eat Lunch in this Town Again and she advises that people never meet their heroes because it will always be a disappointment. Part of me thinks that is overly negative and part of me wishes I had not lived in Los Angeles for so many years before reading it.

Doing band photography and certain sorts of press really really really turned me off of music quite a bit. It makes it a lot harder to enjoy anyone's heartfelt soulful voice and lyrics etc., when you know for a stone cold fact that they are grasping and venal backstabbing users.

That is one place where I kinda wish I hadn't helped make the sausage.

[Satiate]

Man, I don't know where to start on this...

I've quite a few bands that I've regretted meeting, whether in passing or because I was actually a "fan"... Being a music journalist, I've met a few musicians, that in someways, I really helped in their careers or were there for them, when no one else would back them... But as soon as they got success, they literally would pretend to not know me, if I bumped into them randomly at a show or a party... "Success" hits people in weird ways... And read this one carefully... It's always the smaller fish with a Napoleon complex in the pond that have the worst reactions...

But there've been a few musicians/artists that I've met, well, that I can say I was on the fence about their music or casually liked, that after I met them... Heard their story... The songs' secrets... And I've grew to appreciate their music more because I knew what was behind it all... And heard the magic in it...

I will say people like Gary Finneran (singer from The Ex-Idols) whom is on a very short list of people that I was actually nervous to met... (ie, sweaty palms, knees shaking a bit, hard a bit of trouble just to get normal words out...) He's a small footnote in most people's music knowledge, but is one of the biggest influences on my vocals... (When I heard him scream for the first time, I got goose bumps and KNEW I had to learn how to do that how HE did it... and would practice it for hours...) But after 20 minutes of conversation, and some detailed questions asked about songs, he realized my appreciation for his music wasn't some prank being pulled on him by a band mate, and the next thing you know he's one of the loudest guys screaming up front at my shows... And twice now, I've pulled him into recordings to do duets with me...

One certain now extremely famous songwriter/musician/singer, was down on her luck after a long argous battle with her label over getting out of her contract and owning the rights to her songs... I was a fan of her former band, and really loved her songwriting talent... I was working as a buyer for a certain music retail chain and pulled strings to not only get her an in-store with certain companies investing in the $ to pull of the advertisement (because she was no longer signed and was pushing her own music on her own label with no distribution company to get it out there)... I brought down music journalists from local rags (LA Weekly, etc.) and certain A&R people that I knew would appreciate her new songs... We weren't friends, but we talked on the phone a lot... I would pull strings and get her cd placements on endcaps and listening stations, etc. I even got her hooked up with satellite radio feeds... During this time, she hooked up with a friend of mine to be managed... Again, I really helped her out...

Then out of the blue one day, she gets some oppertunities songwriting for some people... Around the time things started on an upswing with her, she literally "forgot" who I was... I never asked for guest lists, free comp cds... I never pushed for a friendship... But man, when you're sitting with someone over coffee once a month for a year and pulling strings to help someone out because you believe in their talent... And then you bump into them at a club, say "hi" and "congrat's" over their success... And they look down their nose at you and say "Do I know you?" It's really pathetic...

Maybe I'm just conceited... But I'm one of those people you either love me or hate me... But you never forget my face or who I am...

So there you go... I just don't go in expecting much, and sometimes I'm disappointed... Sometimes I'm pleasently surprised... Sometimes I laugh my ass off and learn to appreciate the drive if not the talent... Sometimes I get disappointed enough, that I go and sell their cd off...

But Amelia, I'm keeping that quote "I kinda wish I hadn't helped make the sausage"... Yeah, that make me chuckle!!!

[One Eyed Cat]

Man, I don't know where to start on this...

I've quite a few bands that I've regretted meeting, whether in passing or because I was actually a "fan"... Being a music journalist, I've met a few musicians, that in someways, I really helped in their careers or were there for them, when no one else would back them... But as soon as they got success, they literally would pretend to not know me, if I bumped into them randomly at a show or a party... "Success" hits people in weird ways... And read this one carefully... It's always the smaller fish with a Napoleon complex in the pond that have the worst reactions...

But there've been a few musicians/artists that I've met, well, that I can say I was on the fence about their music or casually liked, that after I met them... Heard their story... The songs' secrets... And I've grew to appreciate their music more because I knew what was behind it all... And heard the magic in it...

I will say people like Gary Finneran (singer from The Ex-Idols) whom is on a very short list of people that I was actually nervous to met... (ie, sweaty palms, knees shaking a bit, hard a bit of trouble just to get normal words out...) He's a small footnote in most people's music knowledge, but is one of the biggest influences on my vocals... (When I heard him scream for the first time, I got goose bumps and KNEW I had to learn how to do that how HE did it... and would practice it for hours...) But after 20 minutes of conversation, and some detailed questions asked about songs, he realized my appreciation for his music wasn't some prank being pulled on him by a band mate, and the next thing you know he's one of the loudest guys screaming up front at my shows... And twice now, I've pulled him into recordings to do duets with me...

One certain now extremely famous songwriter/musician/singer, was down on her luck after a long argous battle with her label over getting out of her contract and owning the rights to her songs... I was a fan of her former band, and really loved her songwriting talent... I was working as a buyer for a certain music retail chain and pulled strings to not only get her an in-store with certain companies investing in the $ to pull of the advertisement (because she was no longer signed and was pushing her own music on her own label with no distribution company to get it out there)... I brought down music journalists from local rags (LA Weekly, etc.) and certain A&R people that I knew would appreciate her new songs... We weren't friends, but we talked on the phone a lot... I would pull strings and get her cd placements on endcaps and listening stations, etc. I even got her hooked up with satellite radio feeds... During this time, she hooked up with a friend of mine to be managed... Again, I really helped her out...

Then out of the blue one day, she gets some oppertunities songwriting for some people... Around the time things started on an upswing with her, she literally "forgot" who I was... I never asked for guest lists, free comp cds... I never pushed for a friendship... But man, when you're sitting with someone over coffee once a month for a year and pulling strings to help someone out because you believe in their talent... And then you bump into them at a club, say "hi" and "congrat's" over their success... And they look down their nose at you and say "Do I know you?" It's really pathetic...

Maybe I'm just conceited... But I'm one of those people you either love me or hate me... But you never forget my face or who I am...

So there you go... I just don't go in expecting much, and sometimes I'm disappointed... Sometimes I'm pleasently surprised... Sometimes I laugh my ass off and learn to appreciate the drive if not the talent... Sometimes I get disappointed enough, that I go and sell their cd off...

But Amelia, I'm keeping that quote "I kinda wish I hadn't helped make the sausage"... Yeah, that make me chuckle!!!

Greets Satiate,

Before I forget, I meant to tell u to check out The Ex-Idols ******* page. It's very entertaining and insightful in terms of his experience (and written drunk haha). I can only say he/they should simply be proud to have put out the body of work they did (and I was never "into" them as one of my staples). Good stuff and keeps it real.

I'll get back to the original question later.

Jackie T

[One Eyed Cat]

I have generally met musicians prior to any fame they later accrued. I have been disappointed by a few. I can get turned off fairly easily. My playlist has changed due to this and/or shabby performances. I listen to certain genres of modern music. Most simply do not resonate with me to an extent that they can overcome their own shittiness. I try not to see the sausage being cooked.

Jackie T

[Satiate]

Greets Satiate,

Before I forget, I meant to tell u to check out The Ex-Idols ******* page. It's very entertaining and insightful in terms of his experience (and written drunk haha). I can only say he/they should simply be proud to have put out the body of work they did (and I was never "into" them as one of my staples). Good stuff and keeps it real.

I'll get back to the original question later.

Jackie T

Thanks, though, I really appreciate that... I'm kind of surprised, most people do not know who the hell they are... But actually, I'm in their top friends list... When they reformed to put out their second album, I really helped them out with some stuff... And well, Gary, again, I consider him one of my closest friends/big brothers... He's one of the few people who really get "it"... He's a good mix of Tom Waits meets fucked up Johnny Cash...

The "it isn't just the whiskey talking" bit was written by their guitarist, Duke Decter... (He's currently playing out in Amen...) Sean E., the bassist, now works in the industry as freelance A&R... Lance, the drummer, recently married... And does session work here and there...

"Social Kill" is in my Top 10 favorite albums of all time... Amazing album... From start "Society's Not Killing Me" to finish "If I Die Tomorrow"... And it all kicks off with a censorship quote

"And it really really hurts me, to find the kind of (dramatic pause) CRAP, that's available to kids in music stores today... It really really hurts... really really hurts..."

followed by Gary screaming, out of his mind

"HERE COMES THE PAIN!"

Yeah, the teenage in my still finds the humour and giggles with the adult in me thrusts my fists in the hair and gets goosebumps...

[mmmcherry]

hmmm yeah i used to be really into bryan adams... wait.. .is it bryan or brian? hah see? i dont even know anymore.
ANYWHOODLES... me and a few friends went down to see him at an autograph session at a music store downtown a few years ago, and standing in line outside, store employees came out with note stickeys, wrote our names down on them, and stuck them to whatever we wanted signed, (which by the way, had to be ONLY brian adams merchendise... preferably recent merch... couldnt be an autograph book or anything...AND it could only be ONE peice of merch... lame.) so... we get in there, and hes doing an interview on tv, while signing everything, not talking to his fans or anything, just reading the name on the note stickey and writing a "personalized" note on their cd or whatever..
my friend michelle asked him not to personalize her CD, cause she never really liked having her stuff signed like that i guess, and he says some stupid shit like "why, so you can sell it on ebay??" and she freaked on him, telling him it was for a friend in the hospital...
but yeah... fuck... what a dick! after that i never really could enjoy his music anymore. that REALLY wrecked it for me.

[Sceptic_Messiah]

i used to love going to a gig real early for a chance to meet a band and i've rarely been disappointed. the only band that didnt seem to want anything to do with their fans was satyricon, satyr came out said hello and made an effort...Frost however....was typical Frost and shot off without a word leaving the whole live experience a little bitter.


apart from that no i havent....i've met stone sour, murderdolls, mudvayne, steveo to name a few and all had an awesome time with them!

[Xochitl]

Yes. Actually my ex did art work with a particular person who is rather famous & someone I looked up to & loved in the band he is in & my ex didn't get paid! He was very immature just pissed me off as we had no $ during the holidays a few years ago during Xmas. I don't do the holiday but not the time of year to count pennies to buy a turkey.

The saddest thing is that we gave him the benefit of the doubt due to his touring, when he came back he wanted to know if we "hated him" instead of finding out what was due & paying it like a responsible professional should do. I work part-time in the music biz and opt out of meeting most musicians if I can & keep my conversations to a minimum with them, as I don't like to be disappointed. Unless they have been a musician who has been around for decades or something.

This guy is just a freak. He even got mad at my ex when he approached him about more artwork for an album cover, my ex wanted to talk about $, because hey we do need to eat! Rockstar got mad and explained that most people do stuff for free for him! Yeah, his 15-year-old fans who live at home. Not adults like us who have bills to fuckin' pay! I see him a lot as he lives in my neighborhood but I just avoid him when I see him as he just disgusts me. There is a reason he lives in a nice house in the hills and now that I know I just stay away from meeting anyone I look up to or appreciate.

[One Eyed Cat]

Thanks, though, I really appreciate that... I'm kind of surprised, most people do not know who the hell they are... But actually, I'm in their top friends list... When they reformed to put out their second album, I really helped them out with some stuff... And well, Gary, again, I consider him one of my closest friends/big brothers... He's one of the few people who really get "it"... He's a good mix of Tom Waits meets fucked up Johnny Cash...

The "it isn't just the whiskey talking" bit was written by their guitarist, Duke Decter... (He's currently playing out in Amen...) Sean E., the bassist, now works in the industry as freelance A&R... Lance, the drummer, recently married... And does session work here and there...

"Social Kill" is in my Top 10 favorite albums of all time... Amazing album... From start "Society's Not Killing Me" to finish "If I Die Tomorrow"... And it all kicks off with a censorship quote

"And it really really hurts me, to find the kind of (dramatic pause) CRAP, that's available to kids in music stores today... It really really hurts... really really hurts..."

followed by Gary screaming, out of his mind

"HERE COMES THE PAIN!"

Yeah, the teenage in my still finds the humour and giggles with the adult in me thrusts my fists in the hair and gets goosebumps...

Gary sounds super cool. Does it irk you what kids listen to as well? I understand your reaction, I could see where the dude was coming from.

Jackie T

[Satiate]

Gary is amazing... He's got a new project now with Geoff Seigal (ex-guitarist of The Nymphs... another infamous band that I used to really dig) called She Died

Go here to check it out:
http://www.*******.com/garjeff

They are actually gearing up to play their first gig this weekend...

[One Eyed Cat]

Gary is amazing... He's got a new project now with Geoff Seigal (ex-guitarist of The Nymphs... another infamous band that I used to really dig) called She Died

Go here to check it out:
http://www.*******.com/garjeff

They are actually gearing up to play their first gig this weekend...

Cool. I'll check it out. Hope they have a good turnout.

Jackie T

[helcyon]

ha! no I'm not usually disappointed... expect nothing and you won't get disappointed!

even so... some folk are stand-out fukstiks e.g. Rollins. my god he is out of control wrongness.

on the plus side are my mates from Aus like hoodoo-gurus, kingy from rose tattoo etc. and all us other 80's rockers who have a distinct advantage over youth 'cos we know how to operate our instruments... had enuff time to practise!!! and when we started it was ok to be crap at first... nowadays you have to pop out fully formed unfortunately for the kids..........

[Anarkey]

ive met a few bands i liked back in the day AC/AD ,>nice guys had a blast ,
too many too list , but i set my standards low so im never disapponted

[a_small_death]

Rarley am I ever disappointed when I get to meet a band. Best to this day was wayne static.

[helcyon]

met a few bands i liked back in the day AC/AD ,>nice

nice alright... and meetin AC/DC would've be even nicer!

Can't say I've had the pleasure of meetin either really... although I must confess I did have an actual dream once when asleep (no really) that I was filling in rythym guitar for them at a gig. Even though it was a bit of a stress 'cos I didn't really know the song's properly it was definitely one of those times when it was horribly suddenly disappointing to wake up !

[Buster Friendly]

not a band, but Robert Anton Wilson really went out of his way to act like a dick when I met him.

I didn't even really want to met him, because I knew he wasn't into meeting 'fans' I went out of my way to avoid it, but my friends forced me to meet him... ah well. fuckin' whatever.

[Black Spiral Dancer]

Having only met and spent a lot of time with one band a long time ago. A band called Chaos Engine were playing in Whitby, and we were in the same BnB and spent the whole weekend doing strange stuff, like Crazy Golf in the rain, and putting soap around the rim of one of the more pretentious bands that were playing that weekend.
They got banned from the weekend for that (though the organizers were just looking for a scapegoat for the idiot roadies that put the band's equipment out in the rain)

The Guys from Chaos Engine were just normal folks, out for a laugh and getting pissed on cheap booze!

[Morning Glory]

well most of the bands that I listen to are just "normal" people, as the only thing that distinguishes them from thier audience is that they are playing music while the other is listening to it, and then once they stop, the distinction ends.

to name a prime example is one of my favorite bands, Andrew Jackson Jihad. To me AJJ is like this autonomous musical entity that exists in the spaces between songs on thier CDs. When they are around I just think of them as Sean and Ben, and it's just us talking, or them playing, or us listening to other people play songs, and I kinda forget that they are the same guys that are playing the songs on that Cd and that other people are listening to as the faceless band.

It's really kinda the same way with people that I don't know. seriously fuck rockstars and anyone that thinks that they are the elite or special because they play a guitar is probably looking to score with some insecure/drunk young girls, they are barking up the wrong tree and so more than likely isn't hanging around me or my "scene" anyway.

anyway, it's always kind of awkward with people that you don't know, and if there is any dissapointment, it just stems from that as a universal human condition. It's also kind of wierd when you know all sorts of shit about someone (in a band) that has never met you and knows nothing about you.

[Black Spiral Dancer]

One of my friends is a dj and promoter in the North of England, and one of the bands that he's quite friendly with is Uninvited Guest. The singer is extremely camp (and he looks like stole Liberace's burial clothes). Last time we saw them, my friend wanted to ask the singer for a cigarette, but had to choose his words carefully, since the usual phrase he uses is "Can I bum a Fag off you?" ("Bum" meaning scrounge, and "Fag" meaning cigarette in Geordie/North-Eastern slang)

[mmmcherry]

okay theres another UK term ive never heard... what does "camp " mean??

[ObscureZan]

I've actually never been dissappointed by any band that I've met, actually I've been more surprised than anything else. I managed to get backstage passes for D'espairs Ray and their bassist (My favourite) grabbed my butt and my poor brain was just like 'YES VICTORY POUR MOI!' the same thing happened when I met Dir en Grey. The first time I met them I got hugged by their vocalist (Who now hugs me any chance he gets), the second time I got hugs from everybody, and the third time we were all staying in the same hotel and I caught them going to their hotel room (It was two doors down from mine and I was just in the hallway making phonecalls!) and now they call me "Butterfly"

[helcyon]

okay theres another UK term ive never heard... what does "camp " mean??

It means sort of really effeminate or kitsch or straight-out gay especially with reference to males. That dude from Baltimore John Waters who made movies such as Desperate Living would not mind being referred to as camp I'm sure. You could say "he is as camp as a row of tents"... It's not too insulting I don't think and it's been used that way for a long time.

I never thought about it's origins before this however. dictionary.com provides the following:

"
1.something that provides sophisticated, knowing amusement, as by virtue of its being artlessly mannered or stylized, self-consciously artificial and extravagant, or teasingly ingenuous and sentimental. 2.a person who adopts a teasing, theatrical manner, esp. for the amusement of others. –verb (used without object) 3.Also, camp it up. to speak or behave in a coquettishly playful or extravagantly theatrical manner. –adjective 4.campy: camp Hollywood musicals of the 1940s.
[Origin: 1905–10; perh. dial. camp impetuous, uncouth person (see kemp1); hence, slightly objectionable, effeminate, homosexual; in some senses prob. special use of camp1 brothel, meeting place of male homosexuals]

"

[xXMizVanityXx]

Yes, I have. I actually had a major crush on Gary from Before I Awake and when I met him, he seemed cool at first, like reallllly cool, until he spent the night at my house and we were watching tv, and an Interactive Male commercial came on. He said to me "That is just nasty!!" referring to the whole guy hotline. So I said "Fuck this shit, Im not lusting after some homophobe. That is the biggest turn off for me.