how do you conrol yourselves?

[Host]

no one can help a person who won't help him/herself, no matter how hard they try. i know, it's 4 AM, i'm half-way wasted and really moody. yesterday i've had a party with a bunch of friends, and today i've spent the day drinking/thinking, untill a few of them come back for a sequel. so i feel really stupid for having one of them stop me from taking a leap off the 5th floor, for no approvable reason. i'm probably just spamming the forum...

but i was curious... what do you do when your fuse starts wearing thin... how do you control yourself, not to do anything you might not have a chance to regret? and have you ever regretted holding it, and not just doing what you feel, instead of think?

geez. i'm such a fuck-up. i don't know what i'm doing bugging you people. hope you don't mind.

[cheinara wraithwalker]

I listen to music and write. :| I have to write, and I write really really horrible things: what I want to do to people, the things I truthfully think about people, etc.

It's what I have to do. If I don't have something to write on, I normally unload on a random friend. Poor dears.

[Umbilical Lotus]

No, I understand perfectly.

Everyone has unexplainable urges - the more you have, the more you probably feel trapped in your own life. Everyone's coping mechanism is different, and half the time those urges are just stupid and selfish anyway - we all need to do things we don't want to. So just... find something that works. Hopefully something that isn't as destructive and, well, retarded as cutting, but there's always something.

As for myself, well... it's going to sound very unhealthy, but... I am, basically, an unhappy person. An unhappy, weak, cowardly person. One of the few ways I get to feel strong is through resentment and bitterness, through denying myself things that make me happy. So I... hermit myself. I expend no electricity, I do not entertain myself, I do not eat. I find something that needs to be done and do it, usually something very physical like knocking down my garage or weeding the garden, but yeah, essentially it's self-flagellation but more constructive. After a day or so, I come out feeling pretty terrible... and feeling like the world is a thousand miles away, so remote it cannot sting.

Yay for being fucked up, I guess.

[Nine]

i agree about the music thing...i'm so passionate about music, that it's my only escape and without it i would go crazy.

for others, it might be different
one friend just likes to have sex w/ random people to ease the pain
the other paints
etc

[malcolm]

I try not to control myself thast much anymore. I say whats on my mind, i do what i feel needs to be done and if someone wants to tussle, I pick up the nearest non bolted down object and get in there. It's taken alot not to do these things and I just got tired of how it made me feel. quiet, non confrontational, submissive. im not any of those things, Im a happy prson, im a passionate person and if someone steps over the line, ill show em where it is.

it's jsut easier to ge tit out and not worry bout the small shit of what will happen if I say this or whats gonna happen if I do that. as long as you keep it legal and you aiont hurtin nobody-who cares.

I wouldnt recommend jumping off a fifth floor of anything-sounds like it woul hurt.

but Id say dont hide what you feel either.

[Evilbink]

Control... What's that ??

[Incubi]

exercise.

If you 'hurt' the body bad enough the mind forgets everything.

[suicidal_tendencies]

i used to cut to keep myself from sharing my feelings. now i play drums and write. and sing.

[Host]

well, untill now i've normally done the same thing as Nine and Umbilical Lotus. Listened to a lot of music (actually Anathema) and locked myself away from everyone untill i forget how shittilly i cope with real life societies.

this time i just might try something different, and exercise sounds like a great idea. keeps me occupied, and away from thinking.

thnx guys!
*hugs*

[Mr Karl]

well jumping of the fifth floor probably wouldn't have the desired effect anyway, what I did was the hermit thing for a year, as in no people , you actually go through a like withdrawal period too, of course that wont help you to control yourself but it does give you some time to figure out what your actually controlling