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Thread: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

  1. #1
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    My soon -to-be room mate just backed out on me today, leaving me to find someone new in four days, or be a victim of financial ****. I've spent all my work night on a roommate site, and asking around trying to find someone with $650 who is all set to move into a place. I'm very frustrated. The part that is the worst for me is that I've been friends with this guy for 9 years, and I really don't want to be angry with him. He had an ok reason, I suppose, but it was something I was pretty sure I shared with him in the first place. Right now, that means I have to be fake to him, in order to avoid saying something really harsh. I don't like doing that, but I'm not sure anything else would be very civil.
    I don't really think anyone could be of help, as everyone I've seen is not in my area, so mostly I'm just venting. Feel free to share your own shitty stories, or wallow in pity with me. Or tell me to suck it up, either way.

  2. #2
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    in general room-mates suck, good luck finding another one

  3. #3
    Amelia G's Avatar chick in charge
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    That sucks. I hope you have great luck finding a speedy replacement.

    Just a suggestion, but I think you are doing the right thing not totally harshing on your friend, while you are in a jam. But it might be healthy to tell him how you feel, once you are not completely stressed out abou the situation he put you in.

  4. #4
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Quote Originally Posted by Amelia G
    That sucks. I hope you have great luck finding a speedy replacement.

    Just a suggestion, but I think you are doing the right thing not totally harshing on your friend, while you are in a jam. But it might be healthy to tell him how you feel, once you are not completely stressed out abou the situation he put you in.

    Yeah, I think I will eventually have a discussion with him. The more I consider this, I feel that I have every right to be angry. I would never want this to end my friendship with him, but I think it's a significant roadblock. Screwing one of your closest friends over because of information you simply don't remember hearing isn't cool. That, and I'm always a doormat, and now is as good a time as any to start standing up for myself.

  5. #5

    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Im about to do the same with my roomy soon.. 30 days shape up or ship out.
    I shouldnt be the one to have all the 80% of the bills, work 18 hour days, clean the whole house (dishes, vaccum etc) while he works 8 hour days and plays video games the rest of the time, and hardly gives me rent to begin with if he doesnt spend his whole paycheck in one day.
    But my story is different.

    Did he give a reason why he's backing out? I feel for you really..ive been there..not to long ago.

    Edit: I just noticed you live in Kenosha.. i have a friend in Kenosha who is moving out of her place at the end of Feb...

  6. #6
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Quote Originally Posted by VoldtaEngler
    Im about to do the same with my roomy soon.. 30 days shape up or ship out.
    I shouldnt be the one to have all the 80% of the bills, work 18 hour days, clean the whole house (dishes, vaccum etc) while he works 8 hour days and plays video games the rest of the time, and hardly gives me rent to begin with if he doesnt spend his whole paycheck in one day.
    But my story is different.

    Did he give a reason why he's backing out? I feel for you really..ive been there..not to long ago.

    Edit: I just noticed you live in Kenosha.. i have a friend in Kenosha who is moving out of her place at the end of Feb...
    Yes, he gave me a reason. It was "I don't think I can live with 4 cats". That's perfectly cool, as I don't expect that a lot of people are crazy cat people as I am. The problem is that I never misinformed him, and he has been over to my place on multiple occasions. I distinctly remember telling him the correct number of cats, so I guess I don't see it as being particularly fair that I got screwed over 4 days before rent is due, leaving me precious few days to get my shit together. It's safe to say most people living on their own can't pull $975 out of their ass. There aren't very many cat people out there either. Anyway, done ranting. *deep breath*
    You have a friend in Kenosha? Are you from around here originally, or is that just a freak coincidence?
    Last edited by Janiac02; 02-25-2007 at 01:45 PM. Reason: editing sentence

  7. #7
    and your little dog too
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    i hate people who take advantage like that.

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    CherryCola's Avatar King Of The Swing
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    that happerned to my friend of recently too now his woman is moving in with him. theyve been going out for 2 month i think its a huge mistake but he was desperate so...

  9. #9
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Quote Originally Posted by CherryCola
    that happerned to my friend of recently too now his woman is moving in with him. theyve been going out for 2 month i think its a huge mistake but he was desperate so...
    oh...yeah...mistake. Well, it could work out, I suppose, but there is strong evidence to the contrary. Sometimes you do what you gotta do, I guess.

  10. #10
    CherryCola's Avatar King Of The Swing
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    i dont like her anyway. i adore him to bits but i can't wait to say i told you so.
    good luck with the hunt angel

  11. #11
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Quote Originally Posted by CherryCola
    i dont like her anyway. i adore him to bits but i can't wait to say i told you so.
    good luck with the hunt angel
    Maybe she isn't so bad. Of course, most females have a pretty good intuition about their own gender.
    thanks for the well-wishing. I've at least got the money situation temporarily covered, because my sister is saving my ass.

  12. #12

    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    I have 11 cats. ha.. im crazier than you
    Although they are still babies and in need of good homes.

    And im not from Kenosha..i used to live in Chicago and had friends that worked the Bristol Renn Faire. Off topic..the Mud Show is the best.

  13. #13
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Quote Originally Posted by VoldtaEngler
    I have 11 cats. ha.. im crazier than you
    Although they are still babies and in need of good homes.

    And im not from Kenosha..i used to live in Chicago and had friends that worked the Bristol Renn Faire. Off topic..the Mud Show is the best.
    Oh the Renn Faire...I've lived in Kenosha my entire life, and finally went for the first time this past summer. Didn't get to see the Mud show, but I walked by, if that counts...
    I've had as many as 10 cats, but once my sister and I started moving out, some of the cats were divided up. If I lived in a house, I know I'd probably have like 15. I worked at an animal shelter, and I have a good sized list of adoptees waiting to happen. I'm a sad, sad woman. I figure I'll probably go through several boyfriends, become really jaded and swear off love, then live like a recluse, just me and my multitudes of cats. This I expect to happen by the time I'm 40, or so.

  14. #14

    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Sorry to hijack your thread.. but..hopefully it makes you laugh and forget about your worries for a few seconds..

  15. #15
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    I Love it! It's wonderfully terrible...and definitely going to be me.
    That's the best part about most of the threads posted. The conversation that forms from them is usually far more interesting than the original topic. I don't REALLY wanna sulk about and feel sorry for myself, so distractions are even better

  16. #16
    Mr Karl's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    11 cats? our bylaws limit us to 5 up here

  17. #17
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Karl
    11 cats? our bylaws limit us to 5 up here
    Speed limit signs are also supposed to be followed, but we all know THAT doesn't happen

  18. #18
    Scar's Avatar Senior Member
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    My room mate once gave me 24 hours notice to move out of his place while I was out of town on a date because he got in a fight with the boyfriend of this girl I worked with and I wouldn't agree to disown her. He had actually totally fucked her over and I thought I was being most reasonable by not taking sides. I had only been living there like 4 months too and spent at least 3 hundred bucks re-doing the room I was renting and painting it and puting up faux brick walls...... yeah.. lame-o.

    Hope you find someone rad to movin into your place and all that!

  19. #19

    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    People really suck. Whats even worse is that it was someone you've known for 9 years.

    Goodluck dudette, maybe advertise at a local college or something?

  20. #20
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Quote Originally Posted by Velvet-Tongue
    People really suck. Whats even worse is that it was someone you've known for 9 years.

    Goodluck dudette, maybe advertise at a local college or something?
    I actually found someone on Roommates.com, which helped me out last time as well. The person I found seems pretty cool, she's a microbiologist and humanitarian, currently in Africa and ready to move to the next job assignment for a year or so in my area. That might work out well!

  21. #21
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Quote Originally Posted by Scar
    My room mate once gave me 24 hours notice to move out of his place while I was out of town on a date because he got in a fight with the boyfriend of this girl I worked with and I wouldn't agree to disown her. He had actually totally fucked her over and I thought I was being most reasonable by not taking sides. I had only been living there like 4 months too and spent at least 3 hundred bucks re-doing the room I was renting and painting it and puting up faux brick walls...... yeah.. lame-o.

    Hope you find someone rad to movin into your place and all that!
    I'm sure you don't miss him. Man, I don't know what I'd do with 24 hours to move out. I guess cram myself into one of my parents' places, but that would not be cool.I can't stand when people refuse to let you be uninvolved. How long did it take you to find some place?

  22. #22
    Black Spiral Dancer's Avatar RedHead Admirer Supreme!
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    I used to lodge with an old work-mate, until he went to work for the CSA (Child Support Agency) and he changed. He started being very funny with me, then expected me to pay half of a 168 quid telephone bill (of which my calls only came up to 36 quid) so I went to the council and got the flat I live in now. He wasn't happy that I was leaving, and prevented me from leaving for work until I handed over my keys, leaving all my stuff at his mercy. He waited all day to return my keys whilst at work, and I got what needed from the house, I moved out in one morning, with the help of my siblings. I'm glad the bastard (and I don't use that word lightly) is no longer part of my life. He even tried to tell a mutual friend that she couldn't be his friend and mine, so she had to choose. She said, "Ok, goodbye!" and walked away from him. Soon after that he suffered from severe heart problems, probably because he used to smoke heavily and drink 6 litres of Coke a day.
    I think I'm best off out of that one.

  23. #23
    Janiac02's Avatar Opera Diva Extraordinaire
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    Default Re: Evoking sympathy. Feel sorry for yourself, or me. Either way.

    Oh yuck... crazy with extra cheese on top?
    It's strange how people change after you live with them. Maybe it's best that I don't stay with any good friends, I got lucky that way one, but I'd hate to end up with a real problem on my hands that way.

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