Blue car? Don't let peacocks near it...

[karyn]

from what car

• Peacock 'sexually attacks' Baronet's car
• Car needs extensive respray
• Blue Lexus cars banned from estate

If you plan on visiting Maunsel House in Somerset, the seat of Baronet Sir Benjamin Slade, leave your car at the gate if it's blue.

The Baronet has put in a £4000 bill to his insurers, after he claimed a randy peacock 'sexually attacked' an employee's car.

The car, which was 'Peacock blue', was scratched and dented by the amorous bird, because it looked like 'another peacock boy', according to Sir Benjamin.

It proves the bird is gay, he says, because peahens are brown and only males are blue.

'He attacked the panels so hard that the car needs a total respray,' he said. 'The insurers, Lloyds of London, are not very happy about it. They've had claims for all sorts of things like lions biting people, but they have never heard of a peacock sexually attacking a car before.'

Sir Benjamin continued: 'I've had to ban Peacock Blue Lexus cars from the car park.'

More daft claims
Here are a few more unusual claims gathered by insurer Norwich Union last year:

1. 'A frozen squirrel fell out of a tree and crashed through the windscreen onto the passenger seat.'

2. 'The car was parked when a reindeer fell on the bonnet of my car.'

3. 'As I was driving round a bend, one of the doors opened and a frozen kebab flew out, hitting and damaging a passing car.'

4. 'A herd of cows licked my car and caused damage to the paintwork.'

5. 'A Zebra collided with my car when I was at a safari park.'

6. 'While I was waiting at traffic lights, a wasp went down my trouser leg, which made me hit the accelerator and prang the car in front.'

7. 'I couldn't brake because a potato was lodged under the pedal.'

8. 'My parked car was bit by a bull which had escaped from an agricultural show.'

9. 'A cow jumped on my quad bike.'

10. As I came over a hill, I hit a cow I the middle of the road, which then hit the bonnet and shattered the windscreen with its rear end.'

[helcyon]

karyn this is a fine grab-bag of goofy stuff. i am predjudiced against some colours for cars but not blue,,, red is not real great... and the amount of times i've had to make excuses for failing to achieve acceptable outcomes due to poorly lodged potatoes...

[Eclipse]

They call it an accident, I call it a drive-by via a frozen Kebab!

[Donald Rilea]

This reminds me of a bit done by the British comedian Jasper Carrot, who once took a Sun or other tabloid article listing unusual auto accident claims like this, and incorporated it into his stand-up act.

'Twas strange in the '80's, and is still as strange now.

[Velvet-Tongue]

Lucky there are no randy peacocks around here! /comforts blue car

[Donald Rilea]

Lucky there are no randy peacocks around here! /comforts blue car