Santa's Reindeers.....

[Ajax Knucklebones]

Can you believe people actually think about and ponder this subject? No wonder our economy is so fucked up. People are spending so much time on ridiculous shit. Are Santa's reindeers male or female? I've got the answer. "Who gives a fuckin' shit?!" That's the answer. It's all imaginationland and when it comes to the imagination, everything's anyway you want it to be anyway.



Wildlife experts ponder gender of Santa's reindeer

Friday, December 19, 2008 5:38 AM EST
The Associated Press
By BETSY BLANEY Associated Press Writer


LUBBOCK, Texas (AP) — There may be a perfectly good reason why Santa doesn't get lost on his annual Christmas globetrot: His flying reindeer just might be female and don't mind stopping for directions.
The gender of Rudolph and his or her sleigh-hauling friends — the subject of goofy Internet chatter every year around this time — is now being pondered by renowned wildlife experts at Texas A&M University.
"Santa's reindeers were really females, most likely," said Alice Blue-McLendon, a veterinary medicine professor specializing in deer who cites the depictions of Santa's helpers with antlers as the primary evidence. It turns out reindeer grow antlers regardless of gender, and most bulls typically shed their fuzzy protrusions before Christmas.
But Santa's sleigh helpers might also be castrated males, known as steers, said Greg Finstad, who manages the Reindeer Research Program at the University of Alaska Fairbanks.
Young steers finish shedding their antlers in February and March, just as non-expecting females do. Bulls generally lose theirs before Christmas, while expectant mothers retain their antlers until calves are birthed in the spring. This allows them to protect food resources through harsh weather and to have enough for developing fetuses, he said.
Sledders most often use steers because they maintain their body condition throughout the winter, he said. Bulls are tuckered out from rutting season when they mate with as many as a dozen females in the months leading up to December. That leaves them depleted and too lean to pull a sleigh or sled through heavy snows, Finstad said.
Many females are pregnant after rutting season, which lasts from summer and into the fall. That would mean long hours of backbreaking work for an expecting Rudolph, as well as Donner, Blitzen, Cupid, Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Comet and Vixen.
"You don't hook up your pregnant females to a sled," Finstad said. "That is not good animal husbandry."
But other aaspects of the Christmas story support the all-girl sleigh team theory, Blue-McLendon said.
For example, would a boy reindeer really sport a shiny red nose that almost glows?
"Females like accessories," said Blue-McLendon, who in 2003 led the school's cloning of a white-tailed deer. "I think that fits because females like bling. We like shiny stuff."
As for the reindeer games, forget the rough antler-smashing stuff. Blue-McLendon suggests a female Rudolph would be more up for "games of wit."
And as for the name, Rudolph could certainly still work.
"Why not?" Blue-McLendon said. "I know women named Charlie."

[Vexbeast]

I've never been one to deal with gender-identity issues with figments of other people's imaginations. >.>

[Bacchus88]

interest way to send a event, if one had nothing to do....Why not, I like weird topic like this
vexbeast, figments of other people imagination and gender identity... It like trying to find that tiny pink elephants gender... i say male...

Santa's reindeer I say gender confused, good mix of normal and good bit of redneck fun..

[soma_stardust]

half are male, half are female.
it's only fair. plus that way they can make the next generation of reindeer.
o.o
or something.
and they're magic right so who cares what time of year they're doing such and such... they do whatever whenever it's convenient. duh.

[Mr Karl]

They're all male................if there were any females in the bunch Santa'd have a lot more than eight.

stupid educated people

[soma_stardust]

of course there are more.... there's probably a whole ranch of them. maybe they take shifts. i don't suppose they ever die though... so...
hm. that'd be a fuck of a lot of reindeer.
i'll have to rethink this.
birth control.
they don't reproduce often. or maybe they're responsible for the entire world poulation of reindeer. yeah. that totally makes sense.

[Buster Friendly]

Santa's reindeer can fuck off.

Fucking antlered christmas whores.

[nathanmbailey]

Bulls are tuckered out from rutting season when they mate with as many as a dozen females in the months leading up to December.

That sounds like fun... Why can't humans be like that? That would seriously make the holidays great!

And of course this is being researched in Texas. Why am I not surprised. Oh, and they're all male. Sorry, they are. But, to be fair, the are all totally gay. I mean look at their names. If I could remember them and wasn't too lazy to go back and undo all the deleting from the quote thingy on here to actually get the names of the other however many there are, I would list the rest of the names. To use as an easy example, Rudolph! Has anyone ever, in like, the history of time, ever met a straight man named Rudolph? Seriously! That explains the glowing red nose. It probably glowed brightest when Donner was tapping that ass!

Okay, I'm going to go listen to Weird Al now. Suddenly I have an overwhelming urge to hear "The Night Santa Went Crazy"