69 Eyes have released a video for the debut single off their forthcoming Back in Blood album. The video is called Dead Girls are Easy. It is sort of an 80’s sleaze rock video homage where the 7/11 clerk fantasizes about the hot gothic girls who prance through his store in the midnight hour. In his fantasy, the goth chicks turn out to be vampires who take him for a ride in their black as night car (a 70’s boat style Cadillac), gangbang him, and of course turn him into a vampire. Oh yeah, and the 7/11 clerk turns out to have a slammin’ bod hidden under his horrible orange uniform and he looks much hotter under blue light. Really, everyone looks hotter under blue light (See The Matrix, Underworld, and probably around a quarter to a third of my own photographic body of work.) Then the clerk wakes up and is it a dream or isn’t it? Sort of classic rock video/fairytale storyline.

For some reason, the Dead Girls Are Easy video has been released exclusively for Playboy so far. There is (alas) no nudity in the video, so I assume other outlets would have no problem with it.

Dead Girls Are Easy is directed by Bam Margera. I am embarrassed to say I had to do a search on his name, but he is an awfully accomplished guy. Bam Margera is a pro skater who most notably co-created Jackass and appeared as a primary character in Tony Hawk’s Underground video game from Activision.

I feel like I won back some awareness points, however, when I read the Playboy article about the 69 Eyes video and some of the accompanying text read, “The band may be from Helsinki, but their sleaze-rock sound is straight up Hollywood—think GN’R or L.A. Guns plus the cartoon horror of the Misfits. For the lyrics on the new LP, the 69 Eyes drew inspiration from vintage vampire soft-porn classics by directors like Jean Rollin. Their obsessions come to fruition in Bam’s video, an undead spin on the concept of ZZ Top’s “Sharp Dressed Man.”” I’m absolutely with them on the Sharp Dressed Man comparison, but, uhm, Hanoi Rock anyone? Hanoi Rocks was incredibly influential on the Hollywood hair metal or sleaze rock or whatever people want to call it this week’s scene. And, yes, Hanoi Rocks originally hailed from Helsinki, although it was the drunk driving death of their drummer Razzle in a car crash with Motley Crue’s Vince Neil at the wheel which most pundits agree kept the band from superstardom. Hanoi Rocks’s lead singer Michael Monroe was so ridiculously hot that I once had a girl at a solo performance rock show he performed try to fist fight me for being closer to the stage than she was. In point of fact, at a time when America is primarily marketing ironically uncool altrock and faux wholesome pop, Scandinavia is keeping the homefires of rock and roll and rockstar incandescence burning properly.

Anyway, 69 Eyes. Dead Girls Are Easy. Vampire gangbang sex.

Peter Gibbons: What would you do if you had a million dollars?
Lawrence: I’ll tell you what I’d do, man: two chicks at the same time, man.
Peter Gibbons: That’s it? If you had a million dollars, you’d do two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence: Damn straight. I always wanted to do that, man. And I think if I were a millionaire I could hook that up, too; ’cause chicks dig dudes with money.
Peter Gibbons: Well, not all chicks.
Lawrence: Well, the type of chicks that’d double up on a dude like me do.
Peter Gibbons: Good point.
Lawrence: Well, what about you now? what would you do?
Peter Gibbons: Besides two chicks at the same time?
Lawrence: Well, yeah.
Peter Gibbons: Nothing.

I was going to edit one of the awesomest exchanges in the very awesome Mike Judge movie Office Space to reflect the fantasy of four vampire chicks at the same time, but I figure you all get the concept.

What the Duck is the best comic strip anyone has ever done about photography. Now Blue Blood readers, unless they are viewing the site with some sort of high tech braille conversion computer, are familiar with my more professional lit studio and location photography of rock stars, freaks, and naked people.

I also sometimes like to do, uhm, personal work, where I take my snapshot camera out on the town with me (and sometimes rock stars, freaks, and naked people.) In order to achieve my distinctive brand of party time nightlife photography, I do not look through the viewfinder and I keep the display turned off. I do my best work of this type when alcohol is involved.

I’m not much of a drinker, but I can tear it up from time to time on special occasions. Prior to the age of digital photography, I thought I had never blacked out from drinking. I mean, there was never a dead hooker in my bed in the morning and, in the absence of dead hookers, it is difficult to remember not remembering. Since the advent of digital photography, I’ve been made aware that sometimes less booze equals more memories. For example, I was giving my buddy Gonzo grief for not having introduced me to famous, err, computer wiz Kevin Mitnick when we were all partying in Vegas. Unfortunately, Gonzo was able to produce digital photographic evidence of us hanging out.

At any rate, I was first exposed to What the Duck when my brother emailed me the accompanying webcomic because it made him think of me and specifically my painting the town red snapshots. My brother is a professional photographer and he came across the strip because another professional photographer told him about it. When comic strip creator Aaron Johnson is asked whether he is a photographer, he replies, “I’m 40% photographer, 60% Photoshopper.”

Not to in any way belittle the importance of post-production in modern photography, but Aaron Johnson is 100% hilarious and insightful cartoonist. If you’ve ever picked up a camera for art or business or know too many people who have, the humor in What the Duck is very very spot on and funny.

Have a good weekend and make some good memories everyone. Don’t forget your camera.

And now a word from one of our sponsors:

Thanks to Ginger Dead for their support and for the laugh and the truly appalling Thanksgiving cartoon. Happy Turkey Day everyone!